The People's Republic of Alangrad is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Premier Alan with a fair hand, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, barren, inhospitable landscape, and smutty television. The hard-nosed, democratic population of 11.5 billion Alangradians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, corrupt, liberal government prioritizes Defense, although Education, Administration, and Industry are also considered important, while Spirituality is ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Alantropolis. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Alangradian economy, worth a remarkable 5,321 trillion Alanmarks a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, fairly diversified black market in Information Technology, Book Publishing, Retail, and Automobile Manufacturing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 462,718 Alanmarks, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Graffiti graces every city's streets, youth rights demonstrations often end in vicious snowball fights, hostage-takers offer loyalty scheme points for prompt payment, and torture is illegal. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Alangrad's national animal is the Moose, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Marxism-Alanism.

Alangrad is ranked 286,357^th in the world and 1,390^th in The Communist Bloc for Safest, scoring 4.99 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.