The                              of 9009 is a titanic, orderly nation, remarkable for its smutty television, prohibition of alcohol, and keen interest in outer space. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 17.47 billion 9009ians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Education. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 46.6%.

The frighteningly efficient 9009ian economy, worth a remarkable 5,025 trillion Euros a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, fairly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 287,649 Euros, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 846,499 per year while the poor average 76,960, a ratio of 11.0 to 1.

The government is pouring money into 'Operation Enduring Democracy', the latest guided missile cruiser "Ship-1642" has received precisely zero column inches in the press, consumption of cat memes has skyrocketed, and the government tries not to listen to the people unless it absolutely has to. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. 9009's national animal is the Eagle, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution.

9009 is ranked 324,932^nd in the world and 15^th in Mordor for Nicest Citizens, with 0.3 average smiles per day.