The Colony of 2969 is a massive, efficient nation, remarkable for its burgeoning parrot population. The hard-working, democratic population of 1.526 billion 2969ians are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The tiny, outspoken government prioritizes Defense, with Welfare, Healthcare, and Education also on the agenda, while International Aid and Spirituality aren't funded at all. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 7.8%.

The very strong 2969ian economy, worth 81.7 trillion bitcoins a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is fairly diversified and led by the Woodchip Exports industry, with major contributions from Gambling, Cheese Exports, and Information Technology. Average income is 53,529 bitcoins, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 155,027 per year while the poor average 14,647, a ratio of 10.6 to 1.

All major public areas are watched by police surveillance cameras. Crime is moderate, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. 2969's national animal is the parrot, which can occasionally be seen dodging aircraft in the nation's cities.

2969 is ranked 282,467^th in the world and 23^rd in The Card Void for Most Advanced Law Enforcement, scoring 447.12 on the Orwell Orderliness Index.