The Grossherzogtum of Hixoelop is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Kaiser Ekkehard Valentinianus Von Specht with an iron fist, and notable for its digital currency, ubiquitous missile silos, and smutty television. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 15.487 billion Hixoelopis are proud of their wide-ranging civil freedoms, and those who aren't tend to be dragged off the streets by men in dark suits and hustled into cars with tinted windows.

The relatively small, corrupt, liberal government prioritizes Defense, with Administration, Education, and Industry also on the agenda, while Spirituality and Law & Order are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of omnihorasciipia. The average income tax rate is 95.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Hixoelopian economy, worth a remarkable 9,143 trillion vergoldete Gutschrifts a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Retail. State-owned companies are common. Average income is a breathtaking 590,411 vergoldete Gutschrifts, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Torture is illegal, visiting dignitaries often end up cuddling in the hot tub with Kaiser Ekkehard Valentinianus Von Specht, the undead are an officially recognised ethnic minority (Hixoelop has found 5 easter eggs), and retirement homes are often fitted with luxurious suites. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Hixoelop's national animal is the Steinadler, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is heiliges Licht.

Hixoelop is ranked 621^st in the world and 1^st in Old Zealand for Most Scientifically Advanced, scoring 1,132.95 on the Kurzweil Singularity Index.