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Dispatch → Bulletin → News
TNPV LIX: Grand Final!
official websiteIt is early night, and Mundancy Stadium is packed to the brim with TNPV enthusiasts. Despite many renovations to fit more and more people, it always seems to never be enough. News helicopters are flying around the area, and several pop-up screens are fitted in the nearby parks for the many spectators unable to fit in the stadium.
Chad Chadley II: Finally! An edition with no random mishaps and such. Isn't that sweet, Stevie?
Stevie Sottings: Indeed sir, we haven't had the two of us since the first edition since Mesvice first hosted.
Chad Chadley II: Well, it is common knowledge people can't bear waiting for results in a competition. Some people may skim over a bunch of text that may be important just to see a few numbers!
Stevie Sottings: Yes sir... indeed...
Stevie Sottings ominously stares toward a direction, giving the impression that he is aware of you, dear reader. Don't worry, he's a sweet guy and doesn't bite :)
Chad Chadley II: Oh well, we still need to give the people what they want. Let's go!
The duo slide onto the stage quite literally, they slicked their soles with oil for the dramatic entrance.
Stevie Sottings: Welcome North Pacific, actually the world for that matter, to the North Pacific Vision!
The crowd cheers. Top scientists of Mesvice have made earthquake proof concrete to handle anything the crowd can muster. Quite ingenious!
Chad Chadley II: We are at the finals of TNPV edition 59! Isn't that amazing?
Stevie Sottings: Quite so, sir!
Chad Chadley II: Yeah! Anyways, there isn't much to actually cover. No random celebrity appearances, no injuries...
Stevie Sottings: No impromptu rocket helicopter rides...
Chad Chadley II: Yeah, none of that. How much people know that? It gets lost in the words.
Stevie Sottings: Hmm... I have no idea. Anyways! You know what it is time for!
Chad Chadley II: Ah yes! Turns to the crowd. Everyone, it is now time for the...
Here are the contestants of the grand finals! (In no particular order).










Chad Chadley II: Simply stunning performances!
Stevie Sottings: Shoutout to the crews of all performers, and the acts themselves! Y'all should be proud of yourselves!
Chad Chadley II: While we are waiting for the votes to be sent and tallied, I have something important to announce!
Stevie Sottings suddenly turns white. He is begging Chad Chadley II to not announce his latest book on dad jokes. Chad Chadley II isn't even a dad.
Chad Chadley II: For the first time in Mesvice history, we have a SPONSOR!
Stevie Sottings sighs a breath of relief. He forgot about the sponsor. It's a few seconds before everyone is looking expectantly at him.
Stevie Sottings: What did I do?
Chad Chadley II: (whispering) Stevie, you're meant to start the ad segment.
Stevie Sottings: Drat!

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What a deal!
The few ZemisNorth Technologies Ltdians in the crowd cheer uproariously. The first step to international dominance.
Chad Chadley II: With that out of the way, now we wait for the points to be delivered!
Chief tallier runs onto the stage to give Chad Chadley II the list of placements.
Chad Chadley II: Thank you Ben, your work is always appreciated. Alright crowd, the votes are in! Feast your eyes for the NUMBERS!
The crowd goes wild again!
Red nations mean they were disqualified. Take a look to see how nations vote so differently! It's neat! (This is definitely not because I'm lazy).
12 points – Art Landia
10 points – The Greater Spanish Empire
8 points – Mesvice
7 points – Ethnon
6 points – Semi-Socialist Republic of Thyagalia
5 points – Frismana
4 points – Cleopatra VII
3 points - Luminerra
2 points – Petronellania
1 point – Volkerben
Reserve votes:
First - S O S
Second - Izern
Third - Boo Island
Fourth - Falloa
Fifth - Greater Portugaliza
12 points – Semi-Socialist Republic of Thyagalia
10 points – Boo Island
8 points – Luminerra
7 points – Frismana
6 points – The Greater Spanish Empire
5 points – Greater Portugaliza
4 points – TheLandOfFunFunFun
3 points - Mesvice
2 points – Dacarbatia
1 point – Cleopatra VII
Reserve votes:
First - Petronellania
Second - ForFishing
Third - Art landia
Fourth - Gegenpressreich
Fifth - Volkerben
12 points – Frismana
10 points – TheLandOfFunFunFun
8 points – Ethnon
7 points – Semi-Socialist Republic Of Thyagalia
6 points – Art Landia
5 points – Cleopatra VII
4 points – Volkerben
3 points - Mesvice
2 points – Boo Island
1 point – Luminerra
Reserve votes:
First - Dacarbatia
Second - Izern
Third - Animu Place
Fourth - Greater Portugaliza
Fifth - Gegenpressreich
12p – Falloa
10p – Boo Island
8p – Semi-Socialist Republic of Thyagalia
7p – The Greater Spanish Empire
6p – Petronellania
5p – Ethnon
4p – S O S
3p – Mesvice
2p – Frismana
1p – Cleopatra VII
Reserve votes:
R1 - TheLandOfFunFunFun
R2 - Volkerben
R3 - Izern
R4 - Art Landia
R5 - Gegenpressreich
12 points - Frismana
10 points - Art Landia
8 points - Petronellania
7 points - Mesvice
6 points - Falloa
5 points - Boo Island
4 points - TheLandOfFunFunFun
3 points - Greater Portugaliza
2 points - Ethnon
1 point - The Greater Spanish Empire
Reserve Votes:
First - ForFishing
Second - Izern
Third - Gegenpressreich
Fourth - S O S
Fifth - Luminerra
12 points - Cleopatra VII
10 points - Boo Island
8 points - TheLandOfFunFunFun
7 points - Volkerben
6 points - Luminerra
5 points - Mesvice
4 points - Gegenpressreich
3 points - Animu Place
2 points - Falloa
1 point - Frismana
Reserve Votes
First - Dacarbatia
Second - Izern
Third - Semi-Socialist Republic of Thyagalia
Fourth - The Greater Spanish Empire
Fifth - Petronellania
12 points – Petronellania
10 points – Luminerra
8 points – Greater Portugaliza
7 points – Ethnon
6 points – Cleopatra VII
5 points – Izern
4 points – Falloa
3 points - TheLandOfFunFunFun
2 points – Mesvice
1 point – Boo Island
Reserve votes:
First - ForFishing
Second - Semi-Socialist Republic of Thyagalia
Third - S O S
Fourth - Frismana
Fifth - Art Landia
12 points – TheLandOfFunFunFun
10 points – Volkerben
8 points – Cleopatra VII
7 points – Animu Place
6 points – Frismana
5 points – S O S
4 points – Ethnon
3 points - The Greater Spanish Empire
2 points – Art Landia
1 point – Dacarbatia
Reserve votes:
First - Gegenpressreich
Second - Greater Portugaliza
Third - ForFishing
Fourth - Semi-Socialist Republic of Thyagalia
Fifth - Falloa
12 points – Petronellania
10 points – Izern
8 points – Luminerra
7 points – The Greater Spanish Empire
6 points – Greater Portugaliza
5 points – Semi-Socialist Republic of Thyagalia
4 points – Gegenpressreich
3 points - S O S
2 points – Cleopatra VII
1 point – Mesvice
Reserve votes:
First - Boo Island
Second - Ethnon
Third - Art Landia
Fourth - Animu Place
Fifth - TheLandOfFunFunFun
12 points - Ethnon
10 points - Luminerra
8 points - Animu Place
7 points - TheLandOfFunFunFun
6 points - Boo Island
5 points - Gegenpressreich
4 points - Semi-Socialist Republic of Thyagalia
3 points - Volkerben
2 points - ForFishing
1 point - Frismana
Reserve Votes
First - Petronellania
Second - Dacarbatia
Third - Falloa
Fourth - S O S
Fifth - Art Landia
12 Points: TheLandOfFunFunFun
10 Points: Thyagalia
8 Points: Ethnon
7 Points: S O S
6 Points: Frismana
5 Points: Boo Island
4 Points: Cleopatra VII
3 Points: ForFishing
2 Points: Luminerra
1 Point: Greater Portugaliza
Reserve 1: Izern
Reserve 2: Art Landia
Reserve 3: Petronellania
Reserve 4: Volkerben
Reserve 5: Animu Place
12 points – Frismana
10 points – Greater Portugaliza
8 points - Falloa
7 points – Dacarbatia
6 points – Semi-Socialist Republic of Thyagalia
5 points – Art Landia
4 points – The Greater Spanish Empire
3 points – ForFishing
2 points – Ethnon
1 point – Mesvice
First - Gegenpressreich
Second - Cleopatra VII
Third - S O S
Fourth - Izern
Fifth - Boo Island
12 points – Petronellania – Sevdaliza ft. Pabllo Vittar, Yseult – Alibi
10 points – Mesvice – Chappell Roan – Pink Pony Club
8 points – The Greater Spanish Empire – Maroon 5 – Memories
7 points – Izern – Mahmood – TUTA GOLD
6 points – Art Landia – Shakira – Try Everything
5 points – Semi-Socialist Republic of Thyagalia – JAY-Z ft. Alicia Keys – Empire State of Mind
4 points – Luminerra – Daft Punk – Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger
3 points – Falloa – Faouzia & John Legend – Minefields
2 points – TheLandOfFunFunFun – The Jacksons – Blame It On the Boogie
1 point – Gegenpressreich – Radiohead – Let Down
Reserve Votes:
First – Ethnon – The Waterboys – The Whole of the Moon
Second – Cleopatra VII – CHIC – I Want Your Love
Third – Frismana – Taio Cruz – Dynamite
Fourth – Dacarbatia – Connie Francis – Pretty Little Baby
Fifth – Animu Place – Leon Ware – What's Your Name
12 points – Mesvice
10 points – Petronellania
8 points – Cleopatra VII
7 points – Falloa
6 points – The Greater Spanish Empire
5 points – Semi-Socialist Republic of Thyagalia
4 points – Frismana
3 points – Boo Island
2 points – Greater Portugaliza
1 point – Animu Place
Reserve votes:
First - Dacarbatia
Second - Izern
Third - Art Landia
Fourth - Volkerben
Fifth - ForFishing
12 Points – Mesvice
10 Points – Izwern
8 Points – Animu Place
7 Points – Ethnon
6 Points – Cleopatra VII
5 Points – Petronellania
4 Points – Greater Portugaliza
3 Points – ForFishing
2 Points – Luminerra
1 Point – Frismana
Reserve 1: Art Landia
Reserve 2: Volkerben
Reserve 3: Gegenpressreich
Reserve 4: Falloa
Reserve 5: Boo Island
12 points: ForFishing
10 points: Mesvice
8 points: The Greater Spanish Empire
7 points: Falloa
6 points: Lumminera
5 points: TheLandOfFunFunFun
4 points: S O S
3 points: Petronellania
2 points: Greater Portugaliza
1 point: Dacarbatia
Reserve Votes:
Reserve Vote #1: Semi-Socialist Of Thyagalia
Reserve Vote #2: Ethnon
Reserve Vote #3: Frismana
Reserve Vote #4: Cleopatra VII
Reserve Vote #5: Animu Place
Televotes!
12 points – Falloa with Minefields
10 points – ForFishing with 1985
8 points – S O S with Afterlife
7 points – Mesvice with Pink Pony Club
6 points – TheLandOfFunFunFun with Blame It On The Boogie
5 points – Boo Island with Heaven Sent
4 points – Gegenpressreich with Let Down
3 points - Greater Portugaliza with Bad Liar
2 points – Petronellania with Alibi
1 point – Dacarbatia with Pretty Little Baby
Reserve votes:
First - Luminerra with Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger
Second - Semi-Socialist Republic of Thyagalia with Empire State Of Mind
Third - Cleopatra VII with I Want Your Love
Fourth - Ethnon with The Whole Of The Moon
Fifth - Animu Place with What's Your Name
12 points- ForFishing
10 points-Cleopatra VII
8 points- Petronellania
7 points-S O S
6 points-Ethnon
5 points-Mesvice
4 points-Gegenpressreich
3 points-Thyagalia
2 points-Art Landia
1 point- Volkerben
Reserves
1-Falloa
2-Luminerra
3-Boo Island
4-Izern
5-Greater Portugaliza
The whole crowd cheers in jubilation.
Gegenpressreich,
Volkerben,
Animu Place and
The Greater Spanish Empire (respectively)
Stevie Sottings: All four nations were disqualified. Individual rankings are based on how they would've done if they voted.
The crowds of the four nations are crestfallen. Next time.
With 26 points, 16th place goes to...
Chad Chadley II: Did you know that Connie Francis, singer of Dacarbatia's submission, was the first woman ever to reach first place in the Billboard Hot 100? It was with another song, so unfortunately the popularity didn't come here.
The crowd of Dacarbatians celebrate despite such positions, it's an honour to have made it to the finals. There is still some disappointment however.
With 37 points, 15th place goes to...
Stevie Sottings: Singer of their submission, Mahmood participated in the Eurovision not once, but twice! He got 2nd in 2019, and 6th in 2022! Unfortunately, the TNPV seems to be a more hostile landscape.
The group of Jobs all applaud in joy.
With 49 points, 13th place goes to...
Stevie Sottings: Shakira's going to be in Zootopia 2!
The Art Landian crowd cheer with fun.
With 53 points each, 12th and 11th places (respectively) go to...
Greater Portugaliza and
ForFishing!
Chad Chadley II: ForFishing is ranked higher due to them receiving two 12 pointers, whereas Greater Portugaliza received none.
The crowds of Portugalizans and ForFishingians celebrate together for this uncommon event.
Stevie Sottings: We are now at the top 10!
With 62 points, 10th place goes to...
Chad Chadley II: Kristy Spiteri's Heaven Sent was in the 2025 Malta Eurovision competition to see who will make it to the actual event! Unfortunately it didn't make (hence why it's here instead). From what I heard, it was well-received!
The big crowd of Boos applaud loudly.
With 68 points, 9th place goes to...
Stevie Sottings: The duo Daft Punk made the soundtrack to the movie Tron: Legacy! Makes sense, they sure fit in with the vibes!
The great clump of Luminerrans jam out Daft Punk beats in celebration.
With 69 points, 8th place goes to...
Chad Chadley II: These two have quite some history in their lives. Faouzia is a Moroccan immigrant to Canada and was a recipient in 2023 for the Top 25 Canadian Immigrant Awards! Meanwhile John Legend was in the Oscar defining movie La La Land!
The huge crowd of Falloans cheer and applaud with much vigour.
With both 77 points, 7th and 6th places go to...
Ethnon and
Cleopatra VII!
Stevie Sottings: How fitting! Since they both received one 12 each, we had to look at the 10 points. Cleopatra VII comes out on top with two 10s!
Chad Chadley II: I'm glad the crocodiles won't see me in a while 🐊. Meanwhile, I do this basically every edition, but I have to thank
Ethnon greatly for their work behind the scenes in advising me in situations I handled poorly. He's gone through so much to make this rough edition as smooth as possible. If I ever host again (which is unlikely), my one goal is to make Ethnon work as little as possible. Thank you
Ethnon!
The crowds of Ptolemaics and Ethnonians celebrate grandly together.
Stevie Sottings: The Top 5 is now with us! Buckle your seats everyone!
With 78 points, 5th place goes to...
Chad Chadley II: This edition's facilitator! Many things were done by them to make this edition less crinkly, so thank you
TheLandOfFunFunFun!
The gigantic crowd of Funlandians cheer and dance.
With 81 points each, 4th and 3rd places go to...
Semi-Socialist Republic of Thyagalia and
Frismana!
Stevie Sottings: This is the last tie of this edition, don't worry. Empire State of Mind won two Grammies while Dynamite was in Just Dance 3! I think we all know which is the more prestigious award. Also Frismana is 3rd because it received three 12s! The Semi-Socialist Republic of Thyagalia only received one.
The ginormous crowd of Thyagalians and Frismanans cheer and applaud deafeningly together. What an occasion!
Chad Chadley II: Ah yes, now we have reached the top 2.
Stevie Sottings: Indeed sir! If you all have been paying attention, then you will know the two remaining nations are
Petronellania and
Mesvice! Hey, that's us!
Chad Chadley II: Yes! But who will come out on top to win TNPV LIX?
Stevie Sottings: Will Chappell Roan hold the trophy?
Chad Chadley II: Maybe the trio of Sevdaliza, Yseult and Pablo Vittar will triumph!
Stevie Sottings: Will the tried-and-tested language of English will win once more?
Chad Chadley II: Or will the multicultural concoction of French, English Portuguese AND Spanish take the glory?
Stevie Sottings: Pink Pony Club?
Chad Chadley II: Or Alibi?
With 89 points, 2nd place goes to...
The crowd goes hysterical, the stadium unaffected due to the concrete produced. Outside venues however aren't so lucky.
Chad Chadley II: That means the winner is...
With 98 points, 1st place goes to...
The crowd is absolutely ballistic, and the surrounding parks are torn up in parties of joy and celebration for all.
Stevie Sottings: Thank you for bearing with us!
Chad Chadley II: Warmest wishes to the next host! Remember, cause a scene!
The two walk out off the stage while everyone parties. What a night!
Once again, my inability to create a good scoreboard shows. Welcome to my Google Sheet docs!
Semifinal 1

Semifinal 2

Finals

Huge thanks to
Ethnon and
TheLandOfFunFunFun for helping make this coal of a TNPV edition into something that resembles a diamond. Thank you!
Mesvice,
El Caldron,
Frismana,
The Greater Spanish Empire, Pulsar girl,
Cleopatra VII,
ForFishing,
Art Landia, S o s,
IZERN,
Anne of Cleves in TNP,
Petronellania,
Ethnon,
Greater Portugaliza,
TheLandOfFunFunFun,
Phii,
Dacarbatia,
Name 0,
Shrikisthan,
Cry Nerow,
Jughru,
Renegade Duchies,
Satreburg 2, Radio of cousco,
Reichtangle The Best,
Falloa,
Semi-Socialist Republic of Thyagalia, Gegenpressreich,
Luminerra,
Volkerben, Victorh,
Animu Place,
Singaporen Empire,
New Cordyceps,
Esteneng,
The Democratic Kingdom Of Skaraborg,
Koranz,
Luniandez, Boo island and
ZemisNorth Technologies Ltd
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