The Sovereign Rule of Aestorn is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Older Pig with an even hand, and renowned for its pith helmet sales, frequent executions, and rampant corporate plagiarism. The hard-nosed, humorless population of 13.939 billion Aestornians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, socially-minded government prioritizes Education, although Healthcare, Environment, and Administration are also considered important, while Spirituality and Law & Order aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Gipi. The average income tax rate is 72.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Aestornian economy, worth a remarkable 1,320 trillion coins a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, highly specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing and Book Publishing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 94,712 coins, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Aggravated apostrophe abusers are admonished and assaulted, economic output is rising as the chronically depressed are persuaded not to burden society, whipping posts and lashes have been transferred to the Historical Museum of Aestornian Embarrassments, and the government has adopted a "Lightning Never Strikes Twice" approach to dealing with natural disasters. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Aestorn's national animal is the human, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Atheism.

Aestorn is ranked 22,366^th in the world and 7^th in New Western Atlantic for Most Patriotic, with 44.88 flags saluted per person per day.