The Holy Empire of North historia is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by Moofoose with an even hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, free-roaming dinosaurs, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, hard-working, devout population of 3.731 billion North historians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Stirland. The average income tax rate is 46.4%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient North historian economy, worth 482 trillion dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 129,396 dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The death penalty has been reintroduced, the importance of winning Olympic gold medals is indoctrinated from an early age, violently opinionated speakers can be heard preaching their hateful views on every street corner, and anti-vaxxers claim that injected children are prone to psychotic breaks when they see the 'Queen of Diamonds' playing card. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. North historia's national animal is the Lion, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Christianity.

North historia is ranked 81,189^th in the world and 1,524^th in the South Pacific for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring 3,110.19 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.