The Grand Duchy of Cassaralla is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Grand Duke Christo with an iron fist, and notable for its museums and concert halls, free-roaming dinosaurs, and frequent executions. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 46.179 billion Cassarallans are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Wolfheim. The average income tax rate is 95.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Cassarallan economy, worth an astonishing 20,787 trillion Sovereigns a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, fairly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Beef-Based Agriculture, Gambling, and Uranium Mining. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 450,158 Sovereigns, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.1 times as much as the poorest.

Sex changes are routinely performed at Cassaralla's hospitals, the government has become increasingly militant, the nation's infamous boot camp is more brutal than most battlefields, and legitimate job descriptions now include "smiling and waving". Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Cassaralla's national animal is the wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Orthodox Banjoism.

Cassaralla is ranked 1,781^st in the world and 1^st in Lemuria for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring 8,386.82 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.