New West IndiesBoard

Reno sheriffs department wrote:

Welcome Medri bahri and Britannia iiii to the secret society!

Please bring your sacrificial lamb to the front desk of the General Assembly.

Uhh... we have that now. Okay.

Achipel wrote:

Are you questioning the legitimacy of our government?

Uh oh. I mean, never sir! *Scared laughing.*

Cartel de la letra wrote:

North italian union, Port Town of Chioggia
George Cullingham, suspect, was finally happy. Lifetime work under cover is stressing and even more is seclusion in hideout. Finally he could breathe fresh air and smell the sea. He was wearing boxers, sombrero and Hawaii shirt and was seating at the seaside on the sand. Joint, or better say huge weed cigar, tasted like in a first time. There was no such stuff in New united carolinas! Politics is ruthless, almost as Cartelero life, but it is definitely more constraining. He knew that next day he will be hiding again, but that day was mans birthday and high rank officer as him could have one day of rest after 22 years of hard work. Cartel was always thinking bigger than governments could, but its members do not live longer.

New Raleigh, Old North Province

Kurtis Donnel entered the the CBI headquarters. Employees who recognized him immediately saluted as he walked passed them. Three bodyguards followed closely behind him, internally scanning every corner of the room. Kurtis walked with purpose. He emitted the feeling of power. He approached the front desk, racking the nerves of the secretary behind it. “I need to speak to Nyle.” He said. “It’s disclosed matter concerning the Republic.” The secretary was frozen. “Of course. I’ll let him know you’re coming.” She attempted to salute. “Stop. No need to Salute. Thank you.” Kurt said. “Right” she said. She opened the security doors that led to the elevator. He walked towards it, his guards following close. One stayed behind while the other two boarded the elevator with him.

They silently rode to the top floor, shoulder to shoulder. Eventually, the elevator chimed and slid open, revealing a short hallway with doors leading to offices of top officials of the CBI. Kurtis walked towards the back end of the hallway, where Nyle Cardenas, the CBI director, was currently working.

Kurtis knocked 4 quick times. “Honorable secretary! Come on in.” A voice said from the other side. Kurtis walked in, once again leaving a guard to stand watch outside the office.

“Good to see you, Mr.Donnel.” Nyle said, reaching out to shake his hand. Kurtis returned it. “I suppose you know why I’m here?” Kurtis asked, taking a seat. Nyle opened one of the password locked file holders. “About Cullingham? Yeah, I know.” “The man is a national threat. We don't know what intel he has on the country.”
Kurtis said, crossing his leg over the other. “I hope the CBI managed to find his whereabouts.”

Nyle pulled out one of the holographic files. “Sorry to disappoint. But unfortunately we didn’t find much.” He placed the folder on the desk for Kurtis to read. “Ever since Oopsidroppedmyrightsburg reverted back to PotaTown, he completely disappeared. Like a ghost. Don’t even know how. I have some men out there investigating the living quarters they kept him in. Its like he was never there at all.”

Kurtis sighed, staring at the loosely connected notes, documents, and pictures in the file. He deactivated it and gave it back to Nyle. “The President will not be happy.” He said. Nyle shrugged. “I’ve got an entire floor dedicated to investigating this dude. He disappeared with no trace at all. We’re doing the best we can.”

“Well what about his crime?” Dennis asked. Maybe you can find something there or...?” “We’re on that too, but its hard to say something definitive.” Nyle said, taking out another holographic file. He turned it on, and opened a virtual document. “This shows the provincial budget of the past 3 years he’s been in office. Pretty average for a Carolinian Province. But we had reason to believe that theres actually a percentage of money being taken out of these categories, since a lot of very important projects or funds have gone under paid, despite how carefully the budget was calculated. The first two years, it was assumed to be miscalculation. But this year, a few Appalachian treasurers realized that a sizable chunks of cash that would’ve helped with school funding, transportation, provincial internet connection had just disappeared.”

“Yes...” Donnel said, staring at the graphic. “We have reason to suspect that the money is going somewhere within the charitable budget for the province.” Nyle continued, opening another virtual document. “Look at this. This is the charitable budget. Notice this one here.” He pointed at a listed charity at the bottom of the list. Donnel read carefully. ‘Henry Bonito foundation.’ “I see. What about it?”

“Well, we tried checking it out, but the foundation is so obscure. It claims to be a food donation service in Boone. Its been recognized by Appalachia government, but not the federal government. It must’ve slipped under our radar. So naturally we began tracking the Appalachian expenditures, and as we could see...” he pulled up yet another virtual document, detailing the real percentages of money vs the proposed budget. A lot of that money is going to the appropriate receivers. Except theres no mention of the Henry Bonito foundation. Instead, theres an unmarked account that’s apparently located in Cymiopolis.”

“Cymiopolis?” Kurtis said, a little shocked. “Yes. But thats not all. We took initiative to track his private messages through his phone plan provider. He was sending messages to a Idiocarasian number with no contact information. The phone’s owner is untraceable and theres like, nothing on it. Almost like its being used for this one purpose only.”

“Whoa... they have phones in Idiocarasia?” Kurtis asked. “It shocked me too, but thats besides the point.” Nyle said, chuckling to himself. “But whats weird is that once he found out we were investigating him, he fled to Oopsidroppedmyrightsburg. Which he seemingly had no connection with... except for this note right here.”

He pulled up a picture of a handwritten note they had found in the governor’s home. “Your ride has come. Run. You’re going home. “ it read. “No cameras in the area caught any cars. It was 3am when the nearby security cameras in the area shut down. This tells me he was gone by this time.”

“So we have possible nations he could be in: PotaTown, Cymiopolis, or Idiocarasia?” “Thats correct. But the reason why i way we dont have much luck is that we have our forces investigating in these locations with no avail. The account isn’t actually in Cymiopolis despite its supposed location. They somehow changed its location. There was also no records of a plane landing at any airport in Cymiopolis originating from PotaTown in the only possible time frame he could’ve arrived. Not even a mention of a true identity marker. “What about Idiocarasia?” Kurtis asked. “Most planes that go to Idiocarasia never return from Idiocarasia... it’d be very stupid to go there.”

“So whats left?” Kurtis asked. “See we’re not sure.” Nyle said, closing the file. All we can think of is that he was most likely smuggling money for an illegal business or institution. And he probably had accomplices working in the treasury with him. Three of them disappeared a few days after he fled.”

“Hmm...” Kurtis said, deep in thought.. “Sorry Mr. Donnel. Its all we have.”

page=dispatch/id=1318492

*happiness noises*

Thanks again Karteria

(he made the code cause I didn’t have a computer)

New sistonia wrote:

Archaeological Dig Site Analysis

Analysis #3 Part 1: History Files

Tubes upon tubes lay inside the shelves of a massive room with a small holoprojector in the middle. Tubes can be inserted and then played to find out more of this ancient race. After reviewing bits and pieces of their recorded history among the ages (as it was later found that the tubes were in chronological order) this species barely made it into the space age. However, a massive unity movement occurred when they discovered themselves to no longer be special due to the discovery of other lifeforms. The records continue to outline how they became isolationists and instead focused on technological development to "transcend the barbarity of primitiveness and to embark into an era of eternity beyond the reach of the stars".

However, the tapes take a sudden turn for the worst after a technological breakthrough occurred. Our teams are still reviewing and translating the available material, but it appears that their extinction was not due to their own fault. Rather, it appears as though many civilizations were wiped out in a short time-span a few hundred million years ago.

Analysis #3 Part 2: Technology

While our main goal is to research the history of this species, we have also found detailed plans on how to recreate their own technology, only limited by our own technological resources in creating and powering these contraptions. A few such designs are mainly AI that could help to automate everyday life and make it possible to sustain more colonies while automating more of the labor-intensive functions.

There are also plans for plasma and laser weaponry, which counters our current claims that this species was nonviolent and isolationists. Plans of the available technologies will be copied and sent to the Alpha Centauri system for further analysis.

END REPORT

Archaeological Dig Site Analysis

Analysis #4: The Ship

What remains of this ancient hole in the ground has been scanned, packaged, and shipped to the Centauri system for his majesty's use or to be placed in areas for public viewing. The last item that has yet to be analyzed is a ship of unknown purpose until now. The ship no longer emits power, but after checking what we could we have a decent idea of what its purpose was. We believe it was a colony ship that was retrofitted to restart the species on another world. The insides have been stripped away to allow the most basic forms of life (for humans sperm and eggs) to repopulate a planet, but due to the power lossage the cells died. The cargo bay was also stocked full of what has been named 'Calorie Packs'. These packages are stuffed with vitamins, minerals, nutrients, and the calories needed for their species for a whole day [current theory].

The ship itself is nothing special and in fact is vastly primitive compared to the rest of the complex. We will begin to take apart the ship and move it to another facility, but we believe that all knowledge gained from this has been collected. We will begin to seal the structure and place the appropriate defense and alert systems necessary to preserve the site for future usage if needed.

END REPORT

FINAL REPORT

Most Serene Ministry of Extraterrestrial Affairs

It is with great joy that we announce the expansion of our colonial empire. For the first time ever, Cymiopolitan dominion extends outside of the Solar System into interstellar space. Following the signing of a landmark deal in Septininsular City with the Empire of New sistonia, we now own Antiope (previously known as Evfrippe IVa), the moon of Evfrippe IV and a Class 13 alpine world. This is a mountainous celestial body with a nitrogen-oxygen atmosphere. Snow covers the mountaintops and frozen-over lakes dot the valleys. While the planet experiences the minimal seasonal variations, the still-liquid water beneath the frozen surface of the lakes is enough to sustain some hardy vegetation. The climate is "frozen". It is located in the class-G Evfrippe System.

-Ioannis Phocas,
Minister of Extraterrestrial Affairs

Mordusville,

I love the Pet dispatch! But I demand a correction! Stevie is a female, of course named after Stevie Nicks. And she loves being pet (Just not on the belly)and to cuddle.

How dare you,
RSD

"From oldest to youngest, Ili Gilayil, Gaila Ilajila, Jil Il, Ila Ilki, Igila Jilkigila, Il Ilmug, Ilaila Jil, Jikila Ilan, Ilmig Jila, Jil Ilei, Ila Ilkijil, and Jilaki Kanil, all agree to the following"

The concrete bunker was awash with a riotous, fatalistic festivity. Ili Gilayil, who had been declared new speaker after an unanimous vote, sat upright atop a wooden table, the legs wobbling slightly under the weight of his boots. In a circle around him big glasses of gin and orange juice sloshed around, splashing all over, a loosely rolled joint passed from person to person spilling ashes and thin threads of tobacco. Still, his voice rose above the noise and celebration, as he kept on talking:

"First, we declare the establishment of the third Council of Yymea, and us twelve as it's first parliament" Ilaila Jil cheers at this, and others follow her, including Ili Gilayil, "Our objective, as a liberating force for all of Yymea, is to topple the fascist state that is holding us all hostage. The attack on Kanije village is in two days, so remember to sober up tomorrow. That is all" Ili Gilayil rose his fist in the air, and eleven others followed.

Kanije was a small, war-torn town, whose corrupt police force during the socialist republic had pushed a vast majority of it's citizens to radical political action, becoming one of the first rural areas taken over by the anarchists. During the civil war, the battle for the town lasted days, and thousands were killed, local revolutionary icons slaughtered. Nine of the third Council took to the road, dressed in tattered civilian clothes, with heavy rucksacks slung along their shoulders. They took a bus. The ride took an hour and a half. Once in the town, as everyone left the vehicle, Jil Ilei put a gun to the driver and quietly told him to go off the main road and wait. This was the escape route. A small military garrison had left the town the week before, however there were plenty supplies left over, meant to restock a larger force that would pass through the area in a few days. The town was only defended by the local militia, around 30 or 40 men, mostly unwilling to fight, and 26 members of the federal police force, who has been instructed to keep the supplies safe in the station. Poor security practices in the newly refounded Yymean police made this information quite easy to get a hold on.

The police station was a bulky concrete building, built during the early years of the socialist republic. It had recently been painted over in pastel yellow and blue, the dents of almost fresh bullets searing it's sides barely noticeable. The station was on a slight elevation, built on the same spot as the seat of the colonial government of a former Indian town, destroyed during resettlement. Eight bags dropped to the ground. Ili Gilayil took out a flip phone, called Jil Ilei, let it ring twice, and hung up. The bus would come in five minutes. A quick two seconds of shuffling and the guns were out of the bags. The Black Army ran into the station.

Town hours later, the Yymean state news network released a recording to their official website, TV and radio:
"The police station in Kanije town has been hit by a terrorist attack. Six officers were killed, and eleven are wounded, three critically. We'll keep you updated as we recieve more details. I'm Ilde Ikilailajila, and my prayers go out for those struggling, and the families of the victims."

The next day a complete report was published on print. The group responsible was identified as an anarchist terror organization of unkown size, threat or relevance. Interviews were released from the kidnapped bus driver, who had been kicked out of the vehicle as the escape began, and from both police and civilians who had seen the crime. The public never found out about the stolen supplies, which were plentiful and included expensive and dangerous weaponry, or the upcoming military manouver in the area.

A bus newly painted red and green rolled gently up a mountain road. Ili Gilayil sat down on first row of seats, looking at a photograph, deep in thought. It was a photo of a man, dressed in military uniform, posing on a rock path leading to a gaping hole on the ground. Inside the mouth of the hole, poking out a tiny bit, was the nose of a massive 45 Mt Nuclear Missile. The bus lights cut through the night.

Official message from the Royal Ministry of Colonial and Extraterrestrial Affairs

After our recent expansion on 2-Pallas, we are proud to announce that Fort Pallas, the first dome settlement on the Asteroid, has been finally ultimated and is ready to host a small population of civilians. Nearby construction of a military base, a research facility and a launching station have started.
Italdrill mining company has begin the construction of a new mining site on Pallas and has already established its presence in the nearby unclaimed objects.

With a Royal Act, approved by the Parliament and signed by the King and the Chancellor, 2-Pallas will officially be considered a Constituent State of the Union under the name of Asteroid's Space Colony of Pallas. The Colony will be ruled as a Viceroyalty. After a consultation the Electoral College has selected Lady Annalaura Rosa Minerva to rule the Viceroyalty with the title of Vicereine. She has been officially knighted by his Majesty in Milan this morning.

Thank you for listening
FERT FERT FERT

Welcome New askia to the New West Indies! :)

Welcome New askia to your new home!

Please be advised that taxes are solely paid in bananas.

Wait....bananas were the taxes? I've been paying in noodles this entire time!

Itoshic wrote:

Wait....bananas were the taxes? I've been paying in noodles this entire time!

Sounds like tax evasion to me, hold on one sec while I go get the banhammer from my office!

(OOC: Question, is Kepler 442b claimed by anyone?)

Ventus Prime wrote:

(OOC: Question, is Kepler 442b claimed by anyone?)

No

North italian union wrote:

No

My time has come...

Message from the Office of the Supreme Chancellor

It is with great pleasure to announce our plan to colonize a brand new world, tentatively named Kepler 442b. We have already sent forward an exploration team to the planet and construction will begin immediately. In the next five years, we hope to call this planet our new home and our new capital. With that said, when we are ready to begin our great migration, Io will remain as both a military base and shipyard. I hope you are as excited as I am about this new future for us. Long love the Republic.

Supreme Chancellor Shadow

636 messages later, I remember that I have this nation.