The Fattest Citizens in the Pacific
World Census takers tracked the sale of Cheetos and Twinkies to ascertain which nations most enjoyed the "kind bud."
As a region, the Pacific is ranked 11,580th in the world for Fattest Citizens.
1. | The Rogue Nation of Momstononistan | Corporate Police State | “Better to overreact, than to regret it later.” | |
2. | The NPO High Inquisitor of Myrth | Compulsory Consumerist State | “You may all stop clapping at the ringing of the bell.” | |
3. | The DOMA🎌IN of VIVIEN | Father Knows Best State | “G👏G👏” | |
4. | The Dictatorship of Overdosed crackheads | Psychotic Dictatorship | “Obey or die” | |
5. | The Greedland of Anaxonia | Benevolent Dictatorship | “Si ça bouge pas,bouffe-le!” | |
6. | The Dominion of Teufelvolk | Civil Rights Lovefest | “Fight to the death!” | |
7. | The Kingdom of Yellington | Corporate Police State | “We will crush anyone who stands in our path!” | |
8. | The Social Darwinist Imperium of The Ascendant Hive | Psychotic Dictatorship | “What Crota began, I complete. My will... conquers all!” | |
9. | The Holy Empire of Sons of Shub-Niggurath | Iron Fist Consumerists | “Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl agl fhtagn” | |
10. | The Queendom of Stevist Guam | Corporate Bordello | “For steve!” |