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The 𒁮 𒀭𒈹𒀀𒉌 of Petrokovia

The new roleplay, Rhapsody of Phoenixes, is here!
viewtopic.php?f=31&t=518338

The Serene Paradise of Exaequatio

Nickel Empire wrote:18 or 19 depending on the province to buy alcohol. Funny thing, my dad was carded along with me. He is 53 however the employee thought he looked under 40.

Its a gift to be that age and everyone think you're that young lol

The Imperial Realm of Nickel Empire

Exaequatio wrote:Its a gift to be that age and everyone think you're that young lol

The amount of products and the larger size of your bottles is staggering. I went to two liquor stores and the majority of the products I’ve never heard or I recognized the brand name but there were products under that brand name I never saw before. Even selling soda and the like for mixing drinks is something I’ve never seen before.

The Serene Paradise of Exaequatio

Politico is reporting a leaked initial draft by Justice Alito, that Roe v Wade is going to be overturned. Guess we'll find out more soon.

Sh*t is getting real over here in the US: Here, we ban abortions, ban math textbooks, and punish companies who don't align with your political views.

US is really marching happily along into a more fascistic stance, and we should be looking at all the red flags that many of us seem to be merrily waving.

The Serene Paradise of Exaequatio

Exaequatio wrote:Politico is reporting a leaked initial draft by Justice Alito, that Roe v Wade is going to be overturned. Guess we'll find out more soon.

Sh*t is getting real over here in the US: Here, we ban abortions, ban math textbooks, and punish companies who don't align with your political views.

US is really marching happily along into a more fascistic stance, and we should be looking at all the red flags that many of us seem to be merrily waving.

Well, its a legitimate leak. Alito's memo also makes mention of Griswold, Lawrence, and Obergfell (allows contraceptives to be optained without restriction, prohibits persecution of homosexuals, and legalizes homosexual marriage, respectively). Guess they're next on the chopping block.

The 𒁮 𒀭𒈹𒀀𒉌 of Petrokovia

Exaequatio wrote:Well, its a legitimate leak. Alito's memo also makes mention of Griswold, Lawrence, and Obergfell (allows contraceptives to be optained without restriction, prohibits persecution of homosexuals, and legalizes homosexual marriage, respectively). Guess they're next on the chopping block.

The slope to fascism only gets steeper from here, unfortunately. Communities will have to learn to unite and provide for themselves despite government neglect (or even worse, governmental systemic oppression) if they want to avoid collapse; currently the US might be cracking down more heavily, but if reading through thousands of years of human history has shown me anything, it's that when you keep adding pressure to a system without a vent, it explodes. May in three days, three years, or three decades, but it will absolutely explode.

I think the scariest thing is that cities are food deserts, and in the US don't have much if any capacity to grow their own food.

The Serene Paradise of Exaequatio

Petrokovia wrote:The slope to fascism only gets steeper from here, unfortunately. Communities will have to learn to unite and provide for themselves despite government neglect (or even worse, governmental systemic oppression) if they want to avoid collapse; currently the US might be cracking down more heavily, but if reading through thousands of years of human history has shown me anything, it's that when you keep adding pressure to a system without a vent, it explodes. May in three days, three years, or three decades, but it will absolutely explode.

I think the scariest thing is that cities are food deserts, and in the US don't have much if any capacity to grow their own food.

I honestly just want to kind of move at this point. I've heard people say that this is the "last gasp" before traditional GOP conservativism goes by the wayside as we've seen in the past, but I'm skeptical of this position. I've described politics as a pendulum and the US' pendulum is swinging further and further however which way from the center (though honestly I think the right is getting much more "righter" than the left is getting "lefter" in terms of control). I just want to sort of go somewhere else and out of here.

If you turn on Fox, the biggest issue is that this was leaked by someone (which, yeah, isn't great, but its hardly the thing we should be primarily concerned with). The right is cheering this decision on and your centrists and moderates continue to shrug at everything. GOP had been packing courts the past few years with conservative judges and actively redistricting to change elections in their favor. When will people stop shrugging everything off and "say it won't happen" because no one said Roe v Wade would be overturned, they all laughed it off. Now here we are.

I guarantee they will gun for Obergfell next. GOP is still openly anti-lgbt+ and have banning homosexual marriage still in its platform. All these years of progress are being flicked off like they're nothing.

I was disturbed when CPAC announced they'd have their convention in Hungary, a country often touted by the alt-right as a bastion. Why are people like this? Its so sick...

The 𒁮 𒀭𒈹𒀀𒉌 of Petrokovia

Exaequatio wrote:I honestly just want to kind of move at this point. I've heard people say that this is the "last gasp" before traditional GOP conservativism goes by the wayside as we've seen in the past, but I'm skeptical of this position. I've described politics as a pendulum and the US' pendulum is swinging further and further however which way from the center (though honestly I think the right is getting much more "righter" than the left is getting "lefter" in terms of control). I just want to sort of go somewhere else and out of here.

If you turn on Fox, the biggest issue is that this was leaked by someone (which, yeah, isn't great, but its hardly the thing we should be primarily concerned with). The right is cheering this decision on and your centrists and moderates continue to shrug at everything. GOP had been packing courts the past few years with conservative judges and actively redistricting to change elections in their favor. When will people stop shrugging everything off and "say it won't happen" because no one said Roe v Wade would be overturned, they all laughed it off. Now here we are.

I guarantee they will gun for Obergfell next. GOP is still openly anti-lgbt+ and have banning homosexual marriage still in its platform. All these years of progress are being flicked off like they're nothing.

I was disturbed when CPAC announced they'd have their convention in Hungary, a country often touted by the alt-right as a bastion. Why are people like this? Its so sick...

From our perspective, Dems/Repubs are basically the same thing. It's all one fascist system that has separated itself from the people and now rules over and against them. The US political system isn't designed around representation, it's designed around self-conflict and perpetual argumentation so the wealthy may retain their wealth without the general populace uniting against them. This is also why the media swings both ways on every social issue and constantly tolerates false information; it's societal gaslighting from the government to brainwash the citizenry through long term exposure and indoctrination, and over the course of three hundred years, the US government has firmly planted its "logic" and roots, and has nearly perfected the art of mind control. The current heir of that throne is young, but his continued policies are thousands of years old, after all.

The Serene Paradise of Exaequatio

Petrokovia wrote:From our perspective, Dems/Repubs are basically the same thing. It's all one fascist system that has separated itself from the people and now rules over and against them. The US political system isn't designed around representation, it's designed around self-conflict and perpetual argumentation so the wealthy may retain their wealth without the general populace uniting against them. This is also why the media swings both ways on every social issue and constantly tolerates false information; it's societal gaslighting from the government to brainwash the citizenry through long term exposure and indoctrination, and over the course of three hundred years, the US government has firmly planted its "logic" and roots, and has nearly perfected the art of mind control. The current heir of that throne is young, but his continued policies are thousands of years old, after all.

Yeah, I agree. That's my Ring Theory, after all, haha (okay, Roel gets it ;)

Its just right now, the more overt fascistic elements seem to be hovering on the Republican/conservative wing of the US.

The UFR of Roelandia

Exaequatio wrote:And not only that, but a lot of what I'm seeing are long-term jobs that you don't just bail on after 6 months for a phd. Its a weird situation I've found myself stuck in.

That's really interesting, I guess I'll look more into that as well.

I've heard that phds are different in europe too, but was told they're a little less "robust", though I've always doubted the validity of that assertion. What does your brother mean by "practicality"? We focus on developing and running our own research in american universities, too.

I probably worded it badly, I could ask my brother if he'd be willing to answer some questions you have (as he'd be far more qualified to answer them than I ever will be).

Petrokovia wrote:Tbh I think both of you are. It might also kind of explain why interacting and connecting/relating with most might seem difficult, if you're just kinda used to looking at everything through a different lens for a long time, y'know?

Exaequatio wrote:

While I appreciate the sentiment, I don't know how true that is. I find I tend to be on the lower end of the spectrum in terms of knowledge base and reasoning skills, especially for my field.

I often whish it was true for me too as then the whole grindfest that has been my life so far would have some upside to it (even if that would be a relatively hidden and barely outspoken one).

Exaequatio wrote:

It might just be my depression right now, but what you said has been exactly what is driving me nuts for a long time. These feelings come and go, but they've been sticking on me since I moved back home. And I think its especially grating with how much more social I've gotten as I've started to break out of my shell (and all around just crave more social contact, but am not getting it).

And worse, in order to fit in by wearing a mask, well this "mask" is starting to hurt, and I find I wear it almost everywhere, even with me own family. And when I tell someone this (which is admittedly very rare), they say "oh, everyone wears a mask, that's normal". And yes, that's true, everyone sacrifices aspects of their identity to fit in depending on their social group they are associating with at that particular time. But, even so, many elements of that person is still present (and then there are many who really are a "what you see is what you get" type of person) and they aren't pretending to be someone else entirely. I don't think people realize the severity I wear mine. I just want to be me.

This sounds really serious and also quite unhealthy (not that I'm a good example of intact mental health but still...). It's intersting how you describe "wearing a mask" because, when I look at what I do, I don't feel I wear any mask. I suppose it's closer to the concept of a "veil" rather than that of a mask. I close off parts of myself, mostly expression, towards the outside world and sometimes, for different reasons and for different people in different circumstances it loosens up a little. The only places where that veil is thinnest is with my family (I do have that luxury even when they don't always get me, something you don't seem to have in quite the same capacity, which is a shame really) and almost completely gone with my brother (it's also quite thin around you guys by the way, I just wanted to mention that). Which doesn't hurt quite the same way as you describe your mask but it does make one prone to "numbing" (Which almost entirely kills off the ability to accomodate any form of spontanious reaction). Most of the time I think I might be depressed too (which is a whole different ballgame compared to anxiety by the way, as anxiety is an overabundance of emotion as if a tornado swirls inside your head all the time. Depression on the other hand is the absence of emotion and is basically a feeling of complete numbness with a slight hint of emptyness. I still have to decide which of the two is worse... At least, that's how I experience it and distinguish them) Sorry if I appear to be talking about myself too much here but I do relate to others best by referencing past and/or present experiences so I hope this can at least provide you with some anecdotes that you can relate to and strengthen you in the knowledge that you are the only one that experiences this and that your not alone in this struggle.

The Serene Paradise of Exaequatio

Roelandia wrote:This sounds really serious and also quite unhealthy (not that I'm a good example of intact mental health but still...). It's intersting how you describe "wearing a mask" because, when I look at what I do, I don't feel I wear any mask. I suppose it's closer to the concept of a "veil" rather than that of a mask. I close off parts of myself, mostly expression, towards the outside world and sometimes, for different reasons and for different people in different circumstances it loosens up a little. The only places where that veil is thinnest is with my family (I do have that luxury even when they don't always get me, something you don't seem to have in quite the same capacity, which is a shame really) and almost completely gone with my brother (it's also quite thin around you guys by the way, I just wanted to mention that). Which doesn't hurt quite the same way as you describe your mask but it does make one prone to "numbing" (Which almost entirely kills off the ability to accomodate any form of spontanious reaction). Most of the time I think I might be depressed too (which is a whole different ballgame compared to anxiety by the way, as anxiety is an overabundance of emotion as if a tornado swirls inside your head all the time. Depression on the other hand is the absence of emotion and is basically a feeling of complete numbness with a slight hint of emptyness. I still have to decide which of the two is worse... At least, that's how I experience it and distinguish them) Sorry if I appear to be talking about myself too much here but I do relate to others best by referencing past and/or present experiences so I hope this can at least provide you with some anecdotes that you can relate to and strengthen you in the knowledge that you are the only one that experiences this and that your not alone in this struggle.

And its not really just "a" mask, as in one mask, I have a different mask for different people. I really think it stems from my social anxiety, which implies its not as controlled as I think it is. As I've been reading more about depression lately, I actually think I might have suffered from it my entire life, which wasn't something I ever really thought I had, but the symptoms are strikingly similar to what I deal with. It was gone for a while, but its cropped back up. Both social anxiety disorder and depression seem to run in the family (my mom has SAD and my sister has depression) so I guess its not too outside the realm for me to be the unfortunate soul who got 'em both. Guess I should buy a copy of the DSM-5 and see what else I've got. Probably lots more.

Also I like how you describe your life as a grindfest, it really does feel like that for me too. Stale, repetitive, predictable, empty, meaningless. That's what I feel like most the time with my life. I don't think I'm those things, but my life in general does and most people's lives for that matter (which for some reason bothers me, too).

I feel like your veil analogy is more applicable to most people than my mask analogy. Most people seem to crop out portions of their personality to fit into certain situations, whereas I tend to outright put up a façade (probably a reason why I enjoy acting so much).

And don't apologize, I know why you're relating it back to yourself. Its also very therapeutic too :)

The 𒁮 𒀭𒈹𒀀𒉌 of Petrokovia

Hey, do you guys plan on making posts or apps for the roleplay? It's up! :D
In case you need the link, here's the OOC: viewtopic.php?f=31&t=518338

The 𒁮 𒀭𒈹𒀀𒉌 of Petrokovia

Here’s some more info on the “Sacred Black Forest” in Petrokovia, also known as *Agiasmos Daroumanias* (Αγίασμα Νταρουμανίας). This is where Bismarck was warped.

Thousands of years ago in part of North Petrokovia lived a culture of peoples which called themselves the Darumanians. They took their land and performed, essentially, ancient terraforming across the whole realm. They added and “removed” various plant and animal species to alter the ecology to their whims. Eventually the Darumanian society collapsed and left behind a massive forest predominantly populated by Black Oak, pine, and fir trees. The forest now no longer under such strict control by the Darumanians, species which were forcibly ejected were able to migrate back to the region; alongside them, others who were not native to the Black Forest also joined occasionally, including Kamchatka brown bears.

In the era of Tzarist rule in Petrokovia, the imperial government began using the forest as a kind of staged hunting grounds, staging things like fox or bear hunts for the upper class. In the 1500s, the Tzar bought and imported a number of Kodiak bears, and started a strangely in depth and long term project to cross pollinate the various trees of the forest into a completely new type of tree. As human activity in the Black Forest increased, so did instances of conflict between them and the animal population. Eventually, the reports of humans being hunted by various animals in the woods overwhelmed the Tzarists, who withdrew. This left small populations of humans which were either killed off, or learned to make their own individual peace with the animals. These small groups included self proclaimed witches who practiced an unknown mystical offshoot of Rodnovery; their communities lost contact.

After the Soviet Revolutionary Period, the forest was made into a protected area and a national park, and humans were banned from entering the forest in the interests of making peace with the animals of the forest.

There are a few towns in the forest to this day, and laws regarding curfew and borders between restricted parts of the forest may be unclear at times.

Flora includes pines, firs, oak trees, various vines and small flowers of various color (daisies, violets, honeysuckle, gooseberry, candystick, and coralroot). Patches of peat bog form occasional clearings in the forest (like the one Bismarck’s ship is half sunk into). There’d be too many kinds of fungi to list them all. A similar issue with insects, though large beetles are relatively abundant. Other notable fauna of the Black Forest include crows, robins, pigeons, hawks, geese, sparrows, falcons, eagles, swans, and several kinds of owl (including snowy owls, though that’s more in the western area of the forest, rather than the central area where Bismarck is). Also included are gerbils, rats, mice, rabbits, hares, squirrels, beavers, arctic and red foxes, wolves, black bears, grizzly bears, kodiak and Kamchatka bears, and the largest bear species in Petrokovia (and one exclusive to the nation), the Vestal Cave Bear. These bears are highly intelligent, cave dwelling, and may grow up to four meters tall (when upright). They are known by Petrokovian researchers to craft tools and worship what many consider a protoreligion.

Additionally, Vestal Cave Bears are thought to have inhabited all of Petrokovia at some point, and were driven to near extinction by humans over thousands of years, kind of like lions used to inhabit Europe before being hunted out of existence.

The bears are capable of understanding human speech and body language to an extent, but not fluently. Studies have shown that they possess their own language system which mainly uses body language as a form of signing, but work between some bear communities and park rangers have demonstrated that communication is possible; park rangers in Petrokovia use a custom form of sign language to communicate with the cave bears. Despite having different bodies and so differences in the ability to use the same body language, through consistency the humans have shown the bears new signs the bears would accept as shorthand for their own unreproducable signs, when produced by a human.

The Serene Paradise of Exaequatio

Petrokovia wrote:Hey, do you guys plan on making posts or apps for the roleplay? It's up! :D
In case you need the link, here's the OOC: viewtopic.php?f=31&t=518338

I've been busy, I'll try and post something at some point.

The Serene Paradise of Exaequatio

Anyone want to chat this weekend or play a game or something?

The UFR of Roelandia

Exaequatio wrote:Anyone want to chat this weekend or play a game or something?

Sorry I didn't answer sooner, though, in hindsight,hat might have been for the best as my grandfather died this weekend so I wouldn't have had the opportunity anyway...

The UFR of Roelandia

Petrokovia wrote:Hey, do you guys plan on making posts or apps for the roleplay? It's up! :D
In case you need the link, here's the OOC: viewtopic.php?f=31&t=518338

I'm working on one.

The Serene Paradise of Exaequatio

Roelandia wrote:Sorry I didn't answer sooner, though, in hindsight,hat might have been for the best as my grandfather died this weekend so I wouldn't have had the opportunity anyway...

Oh wow, sorry to hear that. Hope you and your family are doing alright.

The 𒁮 𒀭𒈹𒀀𒉌 of Petrokovia

Roelandia wrote:Sorry I didn't answer sooner, though, in hindsight,hat might have been for the best as my grandfather died this weekend so I wouldn't have had the opportunity anyway...

My condolences, Roel. It’s 100% okay to not be okay right now, and if you’d like to have a conversation about this more privately, or not go into it at all, that’s fine too.

We’re starting to go through something similar with our grandmother, who we learned recently has returned to the hospital after falling and breaking her back for a second time. This is some challenging stuff and I know we haven’t always been the most reliable but maybe we’re all supposed to just be here for each other right now and help each other heal?

The UFR of Roelandia

Exaequatio wrote:Oh wow, sorry to hear that. Hope you and your family are doing alright.

Petrokovia wrote:My condolences, Roel. It’s 100% okay to not be okay right now, and if you’d like to have a conversation about this more privately, or not go into it at all, that’s fine too.

Me and my family are more or less allright. My grandfather had dementia for a couple of years and in some way it feels like we only lost 40% of him in this weekend rather than the complete person that he used to be. As if he was still present physically but was mentally gone for quite a long time already.
We knew it wouldn't be long anymore but even then it happened relatively sudden. He most likely caught an infection to his lungs which made him too weak to withstand, what we suspect, was a mild heart attack.
In the end, it might actually be better this way since his life really wasn't going anywhere anymore. He forgot where he was, what he did just 2 minutes ago and told the same stories all over again, each time we visited. Sometimes multiple times each visit.
It's as if he was frozen in time (which is really not what he was like when he still had all of his senses. He was one of the most intelligent and practical persons I've ever met). The truly sad thing is that my grandmother is now alone. Despite all the shenanigans she went through with him over the past 5 years, she leaned greatly on him (as couples who were married for almost 64 years tend to do) so it will be hardest for her.
To be honest, I don't really know what to feel right now. Also, it still doesn't feel entirely real that a person I have known to be around for the entirity of my life thus far is just...gone... It seems surreal and as such the realisation of it has not fully sunken in at this point (as I always say, "knowing" and "realising" are two completely different things. I "know" that he is no longer here but the true realisation of it, as in its emotional impact, hasn't really registered yet).

Petrokovia wrote:

We’re starting to go through something similar with our grandmother, who we learned recently has returned to the hospital after falling and breaking her back for a second time.

That sounds very serious too. My condolences as well.

Petrokovia wrote:This is some challenging stuff and I know we haven’t always been the most reliable but maybe we’re all supposed to just be here for each other right now and help each other heal?

I suppose so.

The UFR of Roelandia

Exaequatio wrote:

find I tend to be on the lower end of the spectrum in terms of knowledge base and reasoning skills, especially for my field.

Also, I forgot to mention that I have a lot of trouble believing that statement to be accurate.

The 𒁮 𒀭𒈹𒀀𒉌 of Petrokovia

Roelandia wrote:Me and my family are more or less allright. My grandfather had dementia for a couple of years and in some way it feels like we only lost 40% of him in this weekend rather than the complete person that he used to be. As if he was still present physically but was mentally gone for quite a long time already.
We knew it wouldn't be long anymore but even then it happened relatively sudden. He most likely caught an infection to his lungs which made him too weak to withstand, what we suspect, was a mild heart attack.
In the end, it might actually be better this way since his life really wasn't going anywhere anymore. He forgot where he was, what he did just 2 minutes ago and told the same stories all over again, each time we visited. Sometimes multiple times each visit.
It's as if he was frozen in time (which is really not what he was like when he still had all of his senses. He was one of the most intelligent and practical persons I've ever met). The truly sad thing is that my grandmother is now alone. Despite all the shenanigans she went through with him over the past 5 years, she leaned greatly on him (as couples who were married for almost 64 years tend to do) so it will be hardest for her.
To be honest, I don't really know what to feel right now. Also, it still doesn't feel entirely real that a person I have known to be around for the entirity of my life thus far is just...gone... It seems surreal and as such the realisation of it has not fully sunken in at this point (as I always say, "knowing" and "realising" are two completely different things. I "know" that he is no longer here but the true realisation of it, as in its emotional impact, hasn't really registered yet).

That sounds very serious too. My condolences as well.

I suppose so.

Condolences. If you would like some help, I've heard a really good way to think about it is that if he's already pretty much been mentally gone for so long, it might be easier to let go than you'd think. After all, if his head was actually empty this whole time, how much of a personality could he have really had? Might make it easier to ward off the depression.

The UFR of Roelandia

Hey, it's publisher weekend for paradox games on Steam. Up to 80% off.
The game I mentioned earlier, Stellaris, is even free to play for a few days, so you guys can test it and see wheter you like it or not.

https://store.steampowered.com/sale/paradox?snr=1_4_4__118

The Serene Paradise of Exaequatio

Roelandia wrote:To be honest, I don't really know what to feel right now. Also, it still doesn't feel entirely real that a person I have known to be around for the entirity of my life thus far is just...gone... It seems surreal and as such the realisation of it has not fully sunken in at this point (as I always say, "knowing" and "realising" are two completely different things. I "know" that he is no longer here but the true realisation of it, as in its emotional impact, hasn't really registered yet).

My dad's surrogate mother died in much the same way, it sounds like (she had Alzheimer's). By the end, she wasn't able to leave her bed at the hospital. Her brain was in such decline by that point, the rest of her body was slowly shutting down. I don't remember what specifically caused her death in the end, but the essence of what made her "her", was lost many years prior. In a weird way it was relieving for her family when she finally went. On one hand, its a pretty rough way to go as all your friends and family watch you wither away, but on the other hand I imagine it might be one of the better ways to go, as you aren't aware of your own withering and decline. You sort of just fade ignorantly out of existence.

Roelandia wrote:To be honest, I don't really know what to feel right now. Also, it still doesn't feel entirely real that a person I have known to be around for the entirity of my life thus far is just...gone... It seems surreal and as such the realisation of it has not fully sunken in at this point (as I always say, "knowing" and "realising" are two completely different things. I "know" that he is no longer here but the true realisation of it, as in its emotional impact, hasn't really registered yet).

Are they going to have a viewing? If so, is it going to be open casket? Because if it is, that "surreal-ness" will whop you hard, at least in my experience. I actually don't recommend it, its a truly eerie feeling that I can't describe.

Roelandia wrote:Also, I forgot to mention that I have a lot of trouble believing that statement to be accurate.

But why though? If I was smarter than that, I'd be going to much more prestigious universities and not practically begging to get into a phd program, as I crawl my way through job searches that more often than not, don't even give me the courtesy of a rejection letter. And those that do, give me recommendations to apply for things that I am way overqualified for, at least so I think. I've had people tell me I'm "smart" and some even "brilliant" but I am always skeptical of those assertions. I am a very reflective person, more so than most people I'd argue, but this isn't the same as raw intelligence, which I find many people have in spades, at least in my field. These intelligent people may (and often do) have limited reflectance, and so I find their insights are often limited, but I too fall victim to poor analyses, but for limited intelligence. Virtually everyone in my field, for example, can use R and program and code and do crazy math stuff like that. I can't, god I can't even wrap my head around it before my brain just shuts down fast and hard.

The Imperial Realm of Nickel Empire

Roelandia wrote:Hey, it's publisher weekend for paradox games on Steam. Up to 80% off.
The game I mentioned earlier, Stellaris, is even free to play for a few days, so you guys can test it and see wheter you like it or not.

https://store.steampowered.com/sale/paradox?snr=1_4_4__118

The game has been bought.

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