Valkyr Straindorf, I know it sounds a little childish of me and you're certainly not doing this out of pure early Christmas altruism, but thank you for revealing this to me. The report is not a lie, Valkyr exposed this fact to the press of the Krillin countries and it is resonating as I am reading this report. The repercussion is being so strong that the weakest links of the feudal-republican organization (as bizarre as that may sound) are already turning themselves in and confessing their participation in the crime, the police and the Drussian army are arresting all the individuals revealed in the report and their collaborators. I ask Alexander Odibliano Corteza to extradite Mike Bloomblarg to Drussia as soon as possible. With everything I ended up discovering, Bloomblarg, I'm not even going to bother answering you because you're probably running away from the Gustatopolis police.
The republican feudal lord's betrayal will not go unpunished, I will not leave Drussia until this individual pays for the crime against the country he is committing, clearly the revelation of his plan to the public was a severe setback and, God willing, it will be the beginning of his downfall. My maternal family, the Vagsh family, is a feudal family, my mother, Wilhelmina von Vagsh, was feudal lady of the Duchy of Vagsh before she married my father. This conspiracy shames me not only as a monarch, but as a member of one of the 25 feudal families of Drussia, among them one that is betraying not only me, but the country, as I believe that republics are more unstable and difficult to administer than monarchies. The idea of a person who already has power, possessions and wealth in today's Drussia wanting to establish a republic just out of pure greed for more power for themselves, not because they have a distorted notion of justice and consider me an oppressive leader, disgusts me and is a perverse crime, perhaps one of the most perverse in the millennial history of my country. I will not rest until this individual is punished and he will regret betraying the monarchy and the other 24 feudal families of Drussia.
- Nicolaus X, Emperor of Drussia (angry and disappointed)
Update: The government of Gustatopolis cannot extradite a native-born citizen of Gustatopolis, so for that mere reason the extradition request was denied, but Bloomblarg handed himself in to the police, claiming to be the victim of a conspiracy by the republican feudal lord (not Nicolaus X or Valkyr Straindorf, oddly) and claims his life is at risk.
December 2, 2023
The repercussions of the Feudal-Republican Conspiracy (the name as strange as the situation itself) are strong in Krillin, especially in the subregion. Now the feudal lords are in a videoconference meeting with the government of Drussia, whose leader Nicolaus X will not rest until the plotting feudal lord is revealed.
Andreas von Vagsh: look here, when I find out which one of you is the traitor I will torture him to death... and it will be medieval torture, one of those we haven't used since the 19th century! Amaliya Lidochka: Who guarantees us that the traitor is not you? Vagsh: What would I gain by doing something stupid like that?! Lidochka: I don't know, maybe you want to have more power concentrated in your hands, we dilute your power a lot. Vagsh: You guys don't dilute any crap! I am the absolute lord of the Duchy of Vagsh. Konstantin Rodnaevisk, Minister of the Internal Affairs: The absolute lord of all Drussia is the emperor, you idiot! Vagsh: I don't care! Our family is in charge of our land, and he is part of it. In fact, I'm thinking the traitor is Arkadiy Nikanor, after all, why not? he is 17 years old, 17 year olds tend to be more progressive and progressives support republicanism. Therefore, Nikanor is the most likely to be the traitor here!
And most of the other feudal lords are furious with Nikanor.
Oligriove Catrinel: LYNCH HIM! *cough, cough, cough* Nikanor: I bet the traitor is you and that cough is your divine punishment, you dirty scoundrel! Catrinel: What would I gain from this? I am an elderly nonagenarian!
And then most of the feudal lords argue angrily with each other until they are silenced by the mere approach of Nicolaus X in the room. You can tell Nicolaus' anger as he walks because you can hear Nicolaus' footsteps as he approaches the room.
Nicolaus: *clears throat*! Does anyone have any questions...?
The others present just nod their heads from side to side.
Nicolaus: Great, now, without further ado, I will begin the deliberation. Look here, traitor, if you have any ounce of shame on your face and are feeling remorse for what you did, confess now. *and he speaks in a sweet but threatening tone* If you confess, I'll be nice to you, I'll give you a secret royal pardon, we'll both talk in my office where we'll watch TV, drink vodka and play pool... Princess Nicole: Nicolaus, for the love of... Nicolaus: *interruption scream*! let me finish. We're going to play pool, eat cookies and I'm going to make a contract where you give control of your fiefdom to one of your relatives, and you're going to sign this contract because if you don't sign it I'm going to shoot you in the head and YOU'LL TELL EVERYONE THAT YOU WANT TO LIVE IN ANOTHER COUNTRY AND WILL LIVE IN A LIBERAL REPUBLIC SINCE YOU LIKE REPUBLICANISM SO MUCH! *And he starts breathing heavily through his nose*...look, we were going to get together around Christmas in a beautiful way, eating turkey, cake, snacks, cookies and other delicacies, with the children from our families playing together, me and the other guys in my age group from your families would play Monopoly and maybe go horse racing together, we would talk about the stable and prosperous year of 2023 for our fiefdoms and our country, we would make treaty updates and resolve agrarian disputes. All of this was thrown in the trash thanks to the traitor's stupidity. Traitor, do you want to see what your betrayal has brought us? look. *and he turns on the TV*
"Reporter, live from Lincoln D.C.: Here in Gestonia the protests are big, many of the posters have bad words written on them so we had to censor them. Protester, furious, quickly taking the microphone: They are not bad words, what is written on the posters is that THESE FEUDAL FAMILIES HAVE TO END!!" *and the transmission is interrupted* Drussia news anchor: Eh...it seems to me that there was a technical problem in our transmission, while we fix it we go to the commercial break of this special news shift." *and he turns off the TV*
Hans Lidochka, son of Amaliya: Oh, well...that got me thinking, Nicolaus. It made me think a lot about a hypothesis. And if all this is nothing more than your plan? a kind of false conspiracy of yours to justify the end of our families in the eyes of the people. The end of our families would help you, the end of our families would benefit you, the end of our families would give you more power, the end of our families would eliminate checks and balances to your absolute power, to your absolute power to lead the destiny of the people, to lead the destiny not only of the peasants, the townspeople and the bourgeoisie, but also of us, the aristocracy. The aristocracy that would become weaker with the end of our families, the aristocracy that would start serving you, you would build YOUR aristocracy, you would not have an aristocracy inherited from our warrior past, you would have an aristocracy made up only of your puppets, your marionettes, your shadow puppets, your minions, your henchmen, your vassals, you would stop being a human monarch, you...would become a God! Nicolaus: OH, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! Do you think I'm like that? It was just what I was missing... Hans: You've become intoxicated with power, you naughty populist...
*and the two start shouting at each other until they are interrupted*
Arkadiy Nikanor, stuttering: Sto...sto...stop! I...I...conf...conf...confess! I am the...tra...tra...traitor! 😭😭😭 Hans, impressed: Nikanor... Nicolaus: Nikanor...you always stutter like Porky Pig from Looney Tunes whenever you lie. IT'S GOOD TO KNOW YOU'RE NOT THE TRAITOR! I like you, my friend! as a friend, of course. Thank God I can cross one off the list. Andreas: Why don't you cross me off the list? I'm your uncle, I wouldn't gain anything from this stupid plan. Maksimiliam Drankinova: And I'm your fiancée's father! Nicolaus: Uncle Andreas, Mr Drankinova, I also think it wasn't one of you two, but I can't rule out any suspects until I have proof that it wasn't him or until the culprit is discovered. I hope you understand. Andreas: I'll soon send you proof that it's not me! Drankinova: Eh...I'll do the same...and soon too...
OOC: I think I gave a hint that who the traitor is, you can try to guess if you want, but if not Nicolaus or another character will find out as the Roleplay progresses.
Whaat?!? This is insulting! The very idea, that we would fall for whatever dirty tricks those filthy conspirators are supposed to have come up with, and backstab our ally!?! That is absurd! Emperor Nicolaus X of Drussia is an honoured and appreciated friend and ally, as well as a fellow monarch of one of the bastions of the natural order! I would stand firmly by his side, against every filthy democracy and republic in the region, and I am sure the glorious Empress Relena Von Peacekraft of Qassadia would as well! If this conspiracy is for real, I must say the conspirators are beyond delusional!
Different heads of state have different tasks, with different requirements for success. Some heads of state are purely ceremonial, others are powerful political leaders. Perhaps what you meant is, that they do not have the political maturity to be successful in the role of leading an entire nation. I would advice against underestimating them, though.
EMUT (our military intelligence agency) have recieved the documents, thank you. Although this conspiracy did not target Ejoland, I find the part where the conspirators planned to meddle in the elections of Ajidiali and Japanese Kore somewhat concerning. Perhaps they should also be fully informed?
-Eliana Stenberg, Ejoland´s Minister of Foreign Affairs
ok i will listen to suggestions from anyone including our embassys for discord movie night by reply on RMB i have some ideas for it too it will be on maybe next weekend or one after that @everyone
"Well, a good thing about respecting other's religions is" - here he puts a cookie in his mouth, showing his two rows of teeth, and chews it for a bit - "you get more seasonal sweets" - Azya Zaavim, president of Ajidiali
"But additionally... Ajidialian Cleanliness Commission has scanned the grounds of Ajidialian media. Well... It turned out that indeed some independent news outlets had it's ties to the "abroad". Obliviously, I won't drop any names here. But- oh, wait a second-" he fishes out some tissues and a small metal box out of his pocket. For solid 3 minutes he moves something in his mouth with his fingers. Suddenly a wet sound can be heard and he pulls out one of his sharp teeths with bloodied fingers. He puts in the box, cleanes his hands and hides everything back into his pocket. "Ah, 'tis the season, am I right?" - he smiles like nothing happened. "Where was I...? Ah, right. The Commission has also noted that a lot of foreigners has been spotted in the government buildings. It's obliviously not illegal to be there but with all that in mind it's at least a bit suspicious" - Azya Zaavim, president of Ajidiali
Hmppff... I would respect the Roman Catholic faith in the same way, as I respect the Orthodox branch of Christianity, had the current Pope and the Pope before him hot been such walking disasters of progressive politics. But as it seem, the current Roman Catholic Church must be treated with utmost suspicion, just like the "Evangelical Lutheran" churches of Northern Europe.
Also, even if I do respect for example the Cassadian Orthodox Church of Christ, as I would respect the Roman Catholic Church had they still supported the natural order, that does not mean I am ready to compromise with the teachings and practices of my Evangelical Lutheran state church. Just as I respect the authority and position of the Cassadian Orthodox Church of Christ within Qassadia, I also stand by the religious authority of the Church of Ejorike within Ejorike. We Evangelical Lutherans do not worship saints, and I will not compromise on that point!
The fun part is, Christmas is in many countries often celebrated as a secular holiday nowadays. Just as Saint Lucy´s Day is celebrated in a rather secular manner in Lutheran/historially Lutheran countries in Northern Europe. Singing about a Catholic saint like that is certainly not something they would had done during the height of Protestant-Catholic rivalry, the current tradition of Saint Lucy´s Day is no more than a hundred years old there.
-Eliana Stenberg, Ejoland´s Minister of Foreign Affairs
"Hmm, the nearest important holliday in Ajidiali will be around the New Year's Eve! Our religion is completely separate from majority of your's tho. These foreigners in the parliament are starting to worry me. When I reached it today morning there were a lot of them wandering the halls. These foregin owned news agencies are also something to take care of... Not in the sense of getting rid of them, obliviously, yet it worries me. The news they provide don't seem to stand against the current status in the government but they might turn around any moment. Ajidialian elections are hard to meddle with since they happen every month and the change happens gradually. And yet... The Cleanliness Commission suggests to take a better look at the strangers. Should we start checking IDs or passports of people who come inside the Government's buildings? Well... After all no-one is allowed to live in Ajidiali for longer than a year without becoming a citizen..." - Azya Zaavim, president of Ajidiali
Thanks for the updates, Mr. Zaavim, they will be useful for me to find out who the conspirator is. When I find out, I'll alert everyone here to resolve this story once and for all, I hope it's soon so we can have a peaceful end of the year. Now, an unrelated fact, I have been thinking about investing a small amount that I will not miss from my personal fortune in cryptocurrencies, because my friend Hans Lidochka says that Bitcoin is the currency of the future and that within 10 years physical currencies will be replaced by it (my country's clearly won't be because here we have restrictions on certain types of technology, but for me to do business with other nations or to buy things abroad, having a fortune in bitcoin could come in handy)
Do you think I should make this investment or would it be too risky? I don't want, I don't know, to invest 10 thousand rubles and end up losing 100 million or something similar, I don't know if the financial market works like that, if I only lose what I invest, it's okay if I end up at a loss, I'll just lose one an amount that I won't miss, and I'm rich, so I can invest an amount that would be too high for an ordinary person (From what I know, a person has to invest a large amount to have a significant return on the investment, which is how it works in the Drussian financial market). Maybe you know as much about the international financial market as I do, but asking doesn't hurt.
- Nicolaus X, Emperor of Drussia
The feudal-republican conspiracy has an internal and an external arm. The internal arm is acting in a more hidden and differentiated way because if it did not change its modus operandi, it could end up being discovered, while the external arm is starting to attract the attention of the government of The Most Serene Republic of Ajidiali. Now Ajidiali's conspirators and the top of the conspiracy hierarchy are in a video conference meeting:
Mikhail Lovenisk, an individual who until last year worked for Nicolaus X's uncle: Good morning, collaborators, this is our first meeting without your boss, Mike Bloomblarg. It's sad that he ended up being discovered, but everything has a positive side, now you're going to talk to...the boss! look how wonderful.
Leader of a media group: Wow, the boss! What is he like? Ajidialian politician: I don't care, I only care that he tells us a way to escape the Ajidialian Cleanliness Commission. I have a reputation to maintain, I will not fall because of the teenager who rules Drussia.
And then Lovenisk turns on the screen on which the face of the head of the conspiracy appears, who appears on the screen wearing a black mask and is using a voice disguiser.
Boss: Good morning. Politician: You can reveal your identity to us. Boss: And risk being reported? no way. I heard you guys are in trouble. Media Group Leader: No, no, boss, it's okay. Politician: We're not in trouble now, but we will be if you don't tell us what to do. Boss: Do I need to tell you what to do? what are you? children, by any chance? Politician: Bloomblarg used to tell us what to do. Boss: *exhales* that's why I had a second in the hierarchy, ok. To begin with, this is the hierarchy: https://imgur.com/scikmia Politician: That's it? I thought it would be something more complex that would involve think tanks, organic intellectuals, media, activists, NGOs, pressure groups, infiltration of traditional parties, new parties, lobbying, that kind of thing. Boss: This part is with Bloomblarg, I deal with the practical part of the plan. This pyramid that I created just now on Imgflip summarizes the spirit, the core of our hierarchy.
Politician: Well, Bloombarg is gone, so how are you going to handle that part now? Boss: Calm down, calm down. First you have to do a rebranding. Politician: Rebranding? Boss: Yeah... now instead of attacking Nicolaus X, you're going to attack... your leader. Politician: Huh...you mean Zaavim. Boss: Yeah. Zaavim. Furthermore, you will stop attacking Nicolaus X and start praising his gentle and manly personality. Isn't he cute? look at this little face: https://imgur.com/mlzsuzI, https://imgur.com/wPeatkr. *thinking: Wow, I think Nicolaus is the only guy I know who can be cute and sexy at the same time.* Media Group Leader: ...huh? what? Politician: Look, here, you idiot, wasn't it to overthrow Nicolaus X that we started this idiocy? Boss: Guys, I have tools to take down Nicolaus X without you attacking him so voraciously, unconventional tools that you won't know what they are because I won't reveal my identity to you. Politician: Oh my God, I'm starting to think I'm working for a teenager! Boss: I'm not a teenager, I'm an adult. A very handsome and badass adult. *thinking: I really am, I'm 18 years old.* Politician: Look here kid, was that kid, Hans, right? Could it be that you are Nicolaus X using us as a plot to justify the destruction of the feudal families? Boss: No, I'm not him. If I were him, I wouldn't say that my face is cute and he's calling me right now. Hi Nicolaus, yes...yes...I like you, before we talk privately, I would like you to say hi to foreign businesspeople I'm talking to about...eh...investment partnerships...my family's fiefdom will become the Drussian Silicon Valley. Nicolaus: Hi, everyone.
The other members of the conspiracy, nervous: Hi...
Nicolaus: I hope Drussia is a good place to invest. But you need to know that we have some restrictions. Do you want me to come into your meeting and explain everything or would you prefer to have a second meeting with me? Boss: Let me solve everything, Nicolaus. Just worry about preparing for the end of year festivities and our Secret Santa party on the 23rd. Politician: Oh my God, am I really working for a teenager?! Boss: Shhhhh!...No, no, Nicolaus, that was a pressure cooker, hehehe. Now let's talk privately. No, no, the meeting was already ending, businesspeople need to take care of their companies. Bye bussinesspeople *and he leaves the meeting to speak to Nicolaus in private*
And then the head of the conspiracy takes off his conspirator's clothes and reveals to the audience that he is...Hans Lidochka, son of Amaliya Lidochka.
Nicolaus: Wow Hans, for those who don't know anything about politics, you've been helping the country a lot lately. Hans: It's just business, business I understand. I took a market trends course, did you know that I built my own fortune selling NFTs? Nicolaus: Wow, congratulations. Even though I think NFTs are nonsense. Hans: Don't be so backwards, Nicolaus, NFT is just a new name for works of art. Physical frames can be NFTs. (https://medium.com/@wac-lab/more-than-a-thumbnail-gallery-the-challenges-of-exhibiting-nfts-in-physical-space-a47bb64d0fe3). In fact, you should invest in Bitcoins, Bitcoin is the currency of the future, soon physical money will disappear in the main countries of the world and Bitcoin will be the alternative. Nicolaus: Cryptocurrencies are decentralized, very volatile and could end up resulting in a financial bubble. Hans: Oh, Nicolaus, if you're scared. Invest an amount that you won't need, so if you end up at a loss, it won't be such a big loss. Nicolaus: I still have fears. And if I invest 10 thousand and in the end I have a loss of 40 thousand, will I have to pay the other 30 or will I just lose the 10 thousand that I initially invested? If I invested 10 thousand, in my head I should only lose the 10 thousand, but I don't know if that's how the market works. What if I lose 100 thousand or 1 million dollars? It would be a lot of money. Hans: Look...I don't know, let's search the internet. Nicolaus: We should ask an economist. Hans: Oh, economists are manipulated by the globalist system, the cryptocurrency market is free from the shackles of metacapitalism. Nicolaus: I don't know, they said that Valladium Valey Bank was a great bank to place your assets, but the bank went bankrupt and many lost all their savings because of it. Hans: Nicolaus, bitcoin has existed for almost 15 years, if this were to happen it would have already happened. Nicolaus: Maybe I should really invest, can you teach me step by step? Hans: Of course, I'll come to the royal palace and teach you everything. Nicolaus: Doesn't your mother need you there in fiefdom? Hans: No, no, she's fine. And this end of the year has been calm around here. Nicolaus: Wouldn't you prefer me to go there? I need to give you the key to the house on the beach, I forgot to give it to you at our friend's wedding yesterday. (OOC: Context, Nicolaus went on a state trip with his fiancee, Eleonora, to a fictional country called Brasilianzuela and Hans had gone there to see a beach house that he bought himself, but he says it was the family, and at one point the two were alone in the beach house and Hans left the key with Nicolaus) Hans: Yeah, maybe. Come here and enjoy our beautiful mountain climate. Nicolaus: The weather in Tratkovisk is also pleasant at this time of year, but I'm wanting to ski. Hans: Hahaha, let's do it!
Mike Bloomblarg gave a plea bargain last week and said the following things about the head of the conspiracy.
* "No, I don't know who he is. He always met me via video conference and wearing a black mask. I only met him in person once, from his voice and hands I realized that he seemed to be a young person. If he is older than Nicolaus X, he must be around 35 years old at most, but he could be as old as Nicolaus X." * "Clearly he's an idiot, he spoke highly of Nicolaus X, saying he was a good leader, but that Drussia should become a republic because the monarchical elite would be old, stupid and corrupt. He doesn't hate Nicolaus X, he just supports the republic because he thinks the monarchy is a delay for the country's development and wants the country to become a new United States, without the 'woke left', of course and he wants to make a 'revolution that does not involve bloodshed', the part about killing Nicolaus X was just a little lie I made up for those below me in the hierarchy of the plan to convince them to join this conspiracy. This guy is a blubberhead, I only participated in this to overthrow Nicolaus X and perhaps a Drussian republic would be more beneficial to my business. The part about attacking Nicolaus X politically was more my idea than his, his plan involves using 'tools' I don't know about, apparently."
And he said he will only talk about the Ajidiali and Japanese Kore branches of the plan to local authorities and if he is offered full immunity and only a $1 million fine.
- Alexander Odibliano Corteza, president of Gustatopolis
A cryptocurrency is just that - a currency. It derive its value from what you can buy for it. The things some crypto-fans say are in the very best case exaggerated, no currency will just magically increase in value forever. If it seem to do, it may well be a bubble - when the bubble "burst" and everyone stop overvaluing the currency, its value will drop and you may end up losing most of what you have invested.
So, if you buy cryptocurrency for 10 thousand rubles, you risk to lose those 10 thousand rubles. However, I can not see how it would cost you anything more than that.
-Eliana Stenberg, Ejoland´s Minister of Foreign Affairs
"Are you asking me if you should invest in crypto...? Oh, I don't know. I wouldn't invest even one olica into these, if I'm being honest. But here's my update: the Cleanliness Commission is starting to seriously overstep. I'm always saying that you can't tell if someone is an Ajidialian just by looking at them! Just a few minutes ago they've brought this parliamentarian called Kalono Ibimk into my office because he "didn't have secondary teeth". Ok, well, not all Ajiadialians shed teeth! The poor guy was so pale, starting talking something about a "cute, yet handsome and manly" something, something... I've heard he flies often to your country so be pulls them out early to not scare your folks. Poor guy, poor guy. That being said these foregin "journalists" are starting to get on my nerves. So... ubiquitous, ugh" - Azya Zaavim, president of Ajidiali
Good morning, good afternoon or good evening (depending on the time zone) Krillin leaders:
I would like to give you some good news: the feudal-republican conspirator who wanted to depose me and found a republic in Drussia has been discovered and his plans completely nullified, so there is a 100% guarantee that the conspirator will not disturb the peace of the people of Drussia again. Hehe...I had written a whole ramble about myself and my thoughts as a monarch and as a human being (like the thought of temporarily abdicating my throne to take a university course, hahaha, what juvenile idiocy of a prince, I'm emperor now, my God) that now I see that it's not worth making you waste time reading, I'm not that kind of person, I think I've left this forum too busy with my problems over the last few days.
I would just like to regret that ScotlandSerenity's posts about movie nights on Discord have been overshadowed by my country's problems. I hope that with the end of this story, these messages will now gain more attention, it is very likely that I will not participate in these movie nights, but some of the main countries could enjoy the experience and Scotland Serenity is so cool and makes our region so peaceful in the difficult times we live in, its leadership should be valued.
Oh, Mr. Zaavim, about the foreign Drussian "journalists", we already know who they are, you can extradite them all, and if they decide to stay in Ajidiali and continue committing counter-propaganda against the Drussian government, we will ask for their names to appear on the Interpol red list, I think this threat alone will scare most of them.
"Well, in contrary to what the Cleanliness Commission suggests they don't seem to be doing any harm to our nation. However, since Ajidiali has nothing against Drusian, if they start taking any actions we will respond. Honestly, I'm kinda done with CC. Now they are suggesting making them Ajiadiali citizens and forceful reeducation... Who even is in this commission? It's been here like, forever? Hang on, I need to check that. In the meantime time, thank you for your help. Also Mr. Ibimk has been missing since yesterday. Do you think that he could have been taken for reeducation? I really need to check this. Goodbye for now" - Azya Zaavim, president of Ajidiali
"Whew, ok. The journalists have left the buildings! Well, aside from the ones who hang out here regularly. We also found Ibimk! He seems to be doing alright, though it looks somewhat beaten. He had a lot of bandages on his head and arms but I think it's nothing serious. The Commission suggests to not think about this too much" - Azya Zaavim, president of Ajidiali
With Christmas and the holidays that are to come ahead, I would like to extend my utmost wishes to everyone here to be of good cheer and most importantly, to spend these moments surrounded by one's dearest family and friends.
As such, I'd like to wish to everyone here Happy Holidays, Christmas and festive New Year : D
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