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by The Totally Naked Fraternity of Retired WerePenguins. . 5 reads.

Oversimplified view of the Antarctic Oasis as told by New Penzance (Blue Booted Bobbies)

The history of the development of nation states on the continent of Antarctica was a complex and difficult subject mostly because few people were interested in the rogue nations that had developed there and those rogue nations were not all that happy with sharing the details of their founding, especially as some of these events might have been illegal on the international level at that time.

The first nation on the continent, located just south of South America, was a nation that was dedicated towards either the death or the martyrdom of someone named “Kenny.” There they set about invading Middle Eastern nations. Taking advantage of the Violet tendency to not want to see women uncovered, they developed units of female commandos that were, to put it mildly, scantly clad. They also developed a chemical weapon that increased the libido of those who inhaled it, probably not a good thing when heavily armed but scantly clad ladies are trying to pass small projectiles of lead through your body with extreme velocity. And they had exploding penguins; emperor penguins that literally exploded.

It was at this time that the nation state of “Tzorsland,” located on the Indian subcontinent, took an interest in the exploding penguins of Kenny and wanted to obtain the “secret.” To this end they created a special team of females based on the forces in the United States known as “Sea, Air, and Land” or SEAL units. While the United States (at the time) did not hold copyrights or trademarks (unlike the United Nations which, thankfully, no longer exists) the nation of Tzorsland decided to call them Penguin teams.

At this point things are difficult to determine with precision because they were classified and because the nation of Tzorsland mysteriously disappeared (to the stars, some insisted) and people started believing that the whole notion of Tzorsland was a work of fiction. It was suggested that the force of the penguin teams were cloned from three genetically enhanced prototypes. In any event, the project proved unsuccessful (in getting the secret of the exploding penguins) and the penguin team members were allowed to settle in Antarctica, but as far from the nation of Kenny as was relatively possible. They settled west of a vast nation state known as the Palentine, after acquiring the rights to a French research station known as Dumont d’Urville, they moved in and divided their new territory into three areas, Turquoise, Emerald, and Ruby. Turquoise was where Dumont d’Urville was located and while, at first, they simply wanted to name the growing city Turquoise City, they stuck to the name of Dumont d’Urville as the proper name for their newly formed capital of the growing nation.

Now given the overall reputation of the region of the Antarctic Oasis which included things like exploding penguins, genetically modified solders (these were a creation of the Palentine that were known by the German word for hunter.), and an amusement part that was dedicated to the character of a talking skull called “Murray,” it would only be natural that the growing nation of “Retired WerePenguins” would, in turn, be accused of some really strange things. This included, for a time, the accusation of cannibalism, with their adoption of the motto “Tourists are Tasty.” They would later have to explain to the international community that this was all an inside joke as they had started to import ostriches to the greenhouse farms and since the ostrich was not native to Antarctica they were jokingly called “tourists.” The French researchers still at the station were perfectly fine, they insisted.

With the collapse of the United Nations, and the formation of the World Assembly, the growing nation joined the ranks and entered into (as the representative from the Palentine called it) the “Festering Snakepit.” The most notable ambassador to the World Assembly was a Flash Blonde (apparently they use hair color as a surname) who became a laughing stock to the world, proving the reputation of the blond hair color. On the other hand, many argue that the World Assembly had fallen into the stupidity of Marxist socialism and even a dumb make blond jock could see the problems and protest them.

Then there came the faithful day when government officials, looking at the abundance of free nuclear energy and the evolution of cities where no one ever needed to go outside in the well below freezing air determined that they should just crank up the temperature and eliminate clothing entirely. With that, they said goodbye to the confines of clothing, to the presence of micro plastics caused by decaying fibers and started working on the technology needed to support a population that no longer had pockets.

Fortunately, a significant section of Dumont d’Urville, known as the “Tourist District” is “clothing optional.” This is important because a significant amount of revenue is derived from people from the Palentine who arrive via a vacuum sealed magnetic levitation “train” and from the various cruise ships that arrive in the summer.

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