'Twas the night before Chistmas, when all through the millennial's communal apartment, not a temptation was visible, apart from a grandmother's see-through garment. Her mustard draped stockings were stuffed in a corner with care, in hopes that Santa wouldn't see them there. The grand kids were nestled all snug in their beds, as the cast of the live action movie Cats! gently rubbed their heads. And granny in her moth covered 'kerchief, and jello shot stained lap, had just settled a bottle of sangria in her tummy for a long winter's nap. When out on the balcony there arose such a clatter, she sprang from her slumber to see what was the matter. Away to the window she rag doll flew like a flash, tore open the windows to see a purple-pink (like pink and purple combined) creature covered in trash. The moon on its breasts and nose covered in Colombian snow, gave it a lusty eye on grandmother's down below. When what to her also wandering eyes did appear, but a miniature greasy Santa with chubby hands full of cheer. With little old toes so lively and quick, she knew that this creature could do the trick. But all of a sudden, more rapid than snails its burglar brethren through the front door they came, they sneakily ate food and SGI characters all the same:
"Now Grinner! Now Sinner! Now Pant Licker and Gropin'!
On Thigh Gap! On Smelly Tree Sap! On Greasy and lost Korean!
To the cheques with signatures forged! To the jewelry hidden in the wall!
Now squelch away! Squelch away! Squelch away!"
As would a burger on the dinner plate of an obese American all the same, they stole and ate everything then left: quick as they came. And to the blue balled grandmother filled with confusion and fright, the little Gremblo jumped off the balcony and said, "Merry Christmas to all.... mmm... and to all a good night!
Then the next morning the children went to their gran, all wholesome, and one by one told her she had a drinking problem.

Fact of The Day:

Banging your head against a wall for one hour burns 150 calories, but it does not make you forget Epstein didn't kill himself