The Most Holy Ukrainian State of Yazakhastan is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Albert I with an iron fist, and remarkable for its otherworldly petting zoo, pith helmet sales, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, hard-working, cynical, devout population of 4.602 billion Yazakhs are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kazan. The average income tax rate is 91.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Yazakhastanian economy, worth 703 trillion Rhybnules a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Information Technology. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 152,912 Rhybnules, with the richest citizens earning 5.4 times as much as the poorest.

Raver DJ XStacy holds multiple medical degrees in chillaxing, people are bored of easy crossword puzzles, charities reserve the right to not help those who go against religious teachings, and bungee jumpers rarely go splat. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Yazakhastan's national animal is the Alicorn, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Russian Orthodoxy.

Yazakhastan is ranked 33,682^nd in the world and 21^st in Callista for Smartest Citizens, with 45.26 quips per hour.