The Holy Empire of White Crewmate is a colossal, pleasant nation, remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape and public floggings. The hard-nosed, hard-working population of 6.373 billion White Crewmateans have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The relatively small government juggles the competing demands of Education, Law & Order, and Healthcare. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 16.1%.

The strong White Crewmatean economy, worth 313 trillion doubloons a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Woodchip Exports, Retail, and Automobile Manufacturing. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 49,149 doubloons, with the richest citizens earning 9.2 times as much as the poorest.

The deaf are perplexed when the weather report tells them that the wind will be "bringing some rain along the Nazi ghosts", major cities shut down as their local sports team takes to the field every day, White Crewmate has designated White Crewmate City as its capital city, and forest fires have dropped dramatically as there are hardly any forests left. Crime is moderate. White Crewmate's national animal is the Imposter, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

White Crewmate is ranked 255,370^th in the world and 4,367^th in Ambition for Most Extreme, scoring 9.78 on the Paul-Nader Subjective Decentrality Index.