The Commonwealth of United Tropics of Torchland is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Prime Minister Ian Smith with an even hand, and remarkable for its sprawling nuclear power plants, daily referendums, and compulsory military service. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic, devout population of 3.528 billion Torchlanders have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The relatively small government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cape Torch and Salisbury. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 44.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Torchlandic economy, worth 822 trillion Torchlandic Pounds a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, and Retail. Average income is an amazing 233,263 Torchlandic Pounds, with the richest citizens earning 8.3 times as much as the poorest.

Things are looking up for sentient toilet bowls, the deaf are perplexed when the weather report tells them that the wind will be "bringing some rain along the Nazi ghosts", the acceptance of acupuncture and other alternative therapies has needled the scientific community, and the government props up questionable pizza establishments in the name of health. Crime is totally unknown. United Tropics of Torchland's national animal is the Hornbill, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Christianity.

United Tropics of Torchland is ranked 168,648^th in the world and 512^th in United Kingdom for Least Corrupt Governments, with 92.43 percentage of bribes refused.