The United Socialist States of United Socialist Republics of Finland is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by kiisseli with an iron fist, and notable for its ubiquitous missile silos, rampant corporate plagiarism, and avowedly heterosexual populace. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 20.936 billion United Socialist Republics of Finlandians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Tamperse. The average income tax rate is 95.9%.

The frighteningly efficient United Socialist Republics of Finlandian economy, worth a remarkable 2,596 trillion Markkaa a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is mostly made up of the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Woodchip Exports. Average income is an impressive 124,006 Markkaa, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Foreign lack of enthusiasm for United Socialist Republics of Finlandian nose-flute disco metal is seen as a reasonable casus belli, children have nightmares about the eerie red glow and constant whirring of newly-installed machines, the banhammer is a standard police sidearm, and environmentalists are advocating slash-and-burn in the nation's forests. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. United Socialist Republics of Finland's national animal is the Seal, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

United Socialist Republics of Finland is ranked 38,579^th in the world and 9^th in Taijitu for Highest Average Incomes, with 124,006.61 Standard Monetary Units.