The Empire of Ukraine Emprie is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Фюрер with an iron fist, and remarkable for its sprawling nuclear power plants, prohibition of alcohol, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 1.07 billion Українці are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Київськийрейх. The average income tax rate is 52.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but underdeveloped Українець economy, worth 54.8 trillion рейхсмаркиs a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, Door-to-door Insurance Sales, and Trout Farming. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 51,254 рейхсмаркиs, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Women wearing male lounge-wear are quizzed for hours by mental health practitioners, Українець junkies argue that poppy stalks are ornamental flowers, hairdressers are among those who have disappeared overnight, and churches frequently hold public 'contraception burnings'. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ukraine Emprie's national animal is the орел, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Фюрерство.

Ukraine Emprie is ranked 214,691^st in the world and 9,970^th in the South Pacific for Smartest Citizens, with 20.16 quips per hour.