The Golden Kingdom of The Oriental Empire is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by Athanasia II Augustina with a fair hand, and renowned for its public floggings, devotion to social welfare, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, democratic, humorless, devout population of 5.421 billion Orientals enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Constantinople. The average income tax rate is 93.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Oriental economy, worth 879 trillion Pax Romanas a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 162,199 Pax Romanas, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.3 times as much as the poorest.

One tree's worth of paperwork accompanies each imported log of timber, Athanasia II Augustina goes out to lunch surrounded by large men in dark glasses, government fact-checkers use surprising amounts of high explosive, and doctors who mutter "Oh my God" often lose their medical license. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Oriental Empire's national animal is the Canis lupus, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Eastern Orthodoxy.

The Oriental Empire is ranked 230,978^th in the world and 1,025^th in Europe for Most Primitive, scoring -301.12 on the Scary Big Number Scale.