The Intergalatic Empire of The Freakin Guardians of the Galaxy is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Chris Pratt with an even hand, and notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, complete lack of prisons, and triple-decker prams. The hard-nosed, devout population of 1.916 billion Freakin' Guardians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Sedonia. The average income tax rate is 76.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Freakin' Guardian economy, worth 251 trillion guardiums a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 131,372 guardiums, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The newest East Lebatuckese coins have "long live East Lebatuck" on heads and "death to The Freakin Guardians of the Galaxy" on tails, the carbon footprint falls along with the human footprint during war, government policy is dictated by Guardianism, and history textbook pages are used as impromptu tissues by distraught students. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Freakin Guardians of the Galaxy's national animal is the anthropomorphic raccoon, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Guardianism.

The Freakin Guardians of the Galaxy is ranked 140,291^st in the world and 128^th in Karma for Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector, scoring 810.78 on the Henry Ford Productivity Index.