NATION

PASSWORD

Telonovia, Land of gold, power, and unity
Most Secular: 3,138thMost Influential: 4,461stHighest Wealthy Incomes: 6,137th
The Greater State of
Iron Fist Consumerists
Influence
Shoeshiner
Civil Rights
Few
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Rare

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Telonovia

Population2.006 billion

CapitalLomania
LeaderMarshal Zelista Horken
FaithAtheism

CurrencyTelonovian Stalisia
AnimalPanther

The Greater State of Telonovia is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Marshal Zelista Horken with an iron fist, and notable for its compulsory military service, pith helmet sales, and avowedly heterosexual populace. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 2.006 billion Telonovians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Law & Order, Industry, and Healthcare are also considered important, while Spirituality and Environment receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Lomania. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 57.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Telonovian economy, worth 269 trillion Telonovian Stalisias a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is an impressive 134,344 Telonovian Stalisias, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 538,180 per year while the poor average 22,502, a ratio of 23.9 to 1.

Signatures have been replaced with illegible scribbles, it is illegal to make racist remarks in public, pocket dialling is a criminal offence, and parents must decide between buying food and taking their children to the park. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Telonovia's national animal is the Panther, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Atheism.

Telonovia is ranked 261,456th in the world and 12,489th in the South Pacific for Most Beautiful Environments, with 7.15 pounds of wildlife per square mile.

Top
5%
Most Secular: 3,138thMost Influential: 4,461stHighest Wealthy Incomes: 6,137thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 6,795thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 7,733rdMost Patriotic: 8,084thLargest Mining Sector: 9,114thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 9,427thLargest Retail Industry: 10,527thMost Corrupt Governments: 11,230thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 12,250thTop
10%
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 17,987thMost Efficient Economies: 18,743rdHighest Average Incomes: 20,074thLargest Black Market: 22,125thMost Advanced Public Transport: 23,020thMost Subsidized Industry: 25,005thLowest Crime Rates: 25,801st
Top
1%
Most Secular: 93rd in the regionTop
5%
Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 141st in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 153rd in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 154th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 182nd in the regionMost Patriotic: 189th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 195th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 257th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 285th in the regionLargest Black Market: 296th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 333rd in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 347th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 465th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 488th in the regionMost Influential: 507th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 577th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 624th in the regionTop
10%
Greatest Rich-Poor Divides: 635th in the regionFattest Citizens: 637th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 710th in the regionLargest Governments: 764th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 806th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 867th in the regionMost Developed: 879th in the regionHighest Drug Use: 897th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 902nd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 944th in the regionMost Stationary: 1,155th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 1,243rd in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Telonovia, parents must decide between buying food and taking their children to the park.
  • : Following new legislation in Telonovia, pocket dialling is a criminal offence.
  • : Following new legislation in Telonovia, it is illegal to make racist remarks in public.
  • : Following new legislation in Telonovia, signatures have been replaced with illegible scribbles.
  • : Following new legislation in Telonovia, movie references are legally admissible in court.
  • : Following new legislation in Telonovia, the morbidly obese often sell stock options on their own corpses.
  • : Following new legislation in Telonovia, attempted suicide is punishable by public hanging.
  • : Telonovia was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Extensive Public Healthcare.
  • : Following new legislation in Telonovia, using "inspect element" is grounds for espionage charges.
  • : Following new legislation in Telonovia, fancy dress parties are raided by military police for new recruits.

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