The Empire of Tardine is a massive, socially progressive nation, ruled by Jasemir Partei Kladerai with an even hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, pith helmet sales, and ban on automobiles. The compassionate, devout population of 2.945 billion Tardineannen are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kardenccia. The average income tax rate is 87.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Tardineani economy, worth 388 trillion Tars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 132,080 Tars, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Solving crossword puzzles requires fluency in at least five languages, the government seizes private property for the 'good of the people', science centers and state of the art laboratories are ubiquitous, and guide dogs for the blind have been seen using government websites. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tardine's national animal is the Desert Dove, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Strefandor.

Tardine is ranked 10,263^rd in the world and 602^nd in The North Pacific for Healthiest Citizens, with 14.65 bananas ingested per day.