The Armed Republic of Svanland is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Mikael Svan with an iron fist, and renowned for its national health service, punitive income tax rates, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, cynical population of 16.264 billion Svanlandians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The large government prioritizes Education, with Healthcare, Defense, and Environment also on the agenda, while Spirituality receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Svancity. The average income tax rate is 93.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Svanlandian economy, worth a remarkable 2,819 trillion Pissetassars a year, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 173,381 Pissetassars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Billions of Pissetassars are being blown on orbital weapons development, protesters are up in arms over new nuclear power stations, diaper ads feature vertically-challenged adults wearing bootees, and military equipment is being auctioned off to extend comatose centenarians' lives. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Svanland's national animal is the Kakstare, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Svanland is ranked 6,977^th in the world and 107^th in the West Pacific for Lowest Crime Rates, with 108.56 law-abiding acts per hour.