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Soem and the search for the golden anus

The Peopledom of Soem was founded long ago by travellers searching for the golden anus, a thought to be mythical creature that could impart its wisdom upon only the worthiest of person. Upon landing on Soem shores the travellers wasted no time in getting drunk and having a beach party, only waking up late the following afternoon, hung over and begrudgingly ready to begin their quest. They followed the nearest stream for many miles, marking their way as they went. After many moons, they finally discovered its source, at the bottom of a great glacier. Two of the best climbers were chosen to ascend the mountain, and to map out the land from above. After many hours of treacherous climbing they finally reached the summit, finding a frozen shrine at its peak glistening as if it were made of diamonds. Inside the icy temple, they found an altar with a small flattened and rounded object much like a large button floating just a few feet above. Could this really be the golden anus, they both approached it cautiously looking for traps or any excuse to get the hell out of there, but before they knew it, they were standing beside the altar. With great trepidation, the bravest traveller removed his right glove and reached out an arm with his index finger poised to gently poke at the floating object....

The Freople of Soem