The Empire of Smarterial is a colossal, genial nation, ruled by Emperor Noah V with an iron fist, and notable for its frequent executions, ubiquitous missile silos, and multi-spousal wedding ceremonies. The compassionate, cynical, devout population of 6.834 billion Smarterialians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Smayrtron Averra. The average income tax rate is 66.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Smarterialian economy, worth 864 trillion Eurosmarts a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, and Basket Weaving. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 126,505 Eurosmarts, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.5 times as much as the poorest.

Family isn't who you're born with but who you abandon in foreign countries, lawyers turn down litigation cases and corporate work in order to focus on lucrative public defence work, kindergartners' favourite dance move is the stop-drop-and-roll, and the price of takeaway food quadruples after 6pm. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Smarterial's national animal is the Wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Roman catholicism.

Smarterial is ranked 11,081^st in the world and 14^th in KAISERREICH for Lowest Crime Rates, with 99.16 law-abiding acts per hour.