The Second Best Colony of Second Best Puppet 50 is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Noah with an even hand, and remarkable for its closed borders, zero percent divorce rate, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless, devout population of 8.129 billion Second Best Puppet 50ians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Industry, and Law & Order. The average income tax rate is 91.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Second Best Puppet 50ian economy, worth a remarkable 1,605 trillion cards a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Information Technology, Beef-Based Agriculture, Retail, and Uranium Mining. Average income is an impressive 197,538 cards, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.2 times as much as the poorest.

Both criminals and civilians are DOA, there are traffic jams at sea as diligent customs officers check every part of every ship, female restaurant chefs are not allowed to have male customers, and boys who even ask about cheerleading are placed on the Sex Offenders Register. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Second Best Puppet 50's national animal is the legendary, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Second Best Puppet 50 is ranked 114,621^st in the world and 358^th in Two for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry, scoring 2,674.29 on the Spitz-Pollish Productivity Index.