The Second Best Colony of Second Best Puppet 39 is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Noah with an even hand, and notable for its pith helmet sales, infamous sell-swords, and restrictive gun laws. The hard-nosed, humorless, devout population of 8.018 billion Second Best Puppet 39ians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The large, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Administration, and Industry. The average income tax rate is 95.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Second Best Puppet 39ian economy, worth a remarkable 1,635 trillion cards a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 203,947 cards, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.0 times as much as the poorest.

People are bored of easy crossword puzzles, major polluting industries have painted a lot of their machines green to give an impression of caring about the environment, teddy bears and pajamas have replaced briefcases and suits in Second Best Puppet 39's offices, and there are traffic jams at sea as diligent customs officers check every part of every ship. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Second Best Puppet 39's national animal is the legendary, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Second Best Puppet 39 is ranked 291,183^rd in the world and 2,559^th in Two for Highest Disposable Incomes, with 9,585.51 Standard Monetary Units.