The Second Best Colony of Second Best Puppet 214 is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Noah with an even hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, deadly medical pandemics, and ritual sacrifices. The hard-nosed, humorless, devout population of 8.167 billion Second Best Puppet 214ians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Law & Order, and Administration. The average income tax rate is 89.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Second Best Puppet 214ian economy, worth a remarkable 1,595 trillion cards a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Retail, Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 195,409 cards, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

Lottery winners spend most of their money on security, parents are always up to speed on the latest childcare techniques, the Treasury has been accused of flushing money down the toilet, and tourists from around the world come to visit the country's famous rainforests. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Second Best Puppet 214's national animal is the legendary, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Second Best Puppet 214 is ranked 123,492^nd in the world and 2,373^rd in Two for Most Conservative, scoring 64.42 on the Bush-Santorum Dawning Terror Index.