The Second Best Colony of Second Best Puppet 213 is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Noah with an iron fist, and notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, keen interest in outer space, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 8.156 billion Second Best Puppet 213ians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Law & Order, and Administration. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 92.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Second Best Puppet 213ian economy, worth a remarkable 1,640 trillion cards a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with significant contributions from Woodchip Exports, Uranium Mining, and Information Technology. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an amazing 201,134 cards, with the richest citizens earning 7.7 times as much as the poorest.

The nation's infamous boot camp is more brutal than most battlefields, twins move across the country to avoid being accused of the other's crimes, quiet professionalism has returned to the nation's armed forces, and parents are fined for sending their children to take out the trash after sunset. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Second Best Puppet 213's national animal is the legendary, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Second Best Puppet 213 is ranked 230,866^th in the world and 1,493^rd in Two for Most Pacifist, with 34.56 cheeks turned per day.