The Second Best Colony of Second Best Puppet 19 is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Noah with an iron fist, and notable for its aversion to nipples, frequent executions, and compulsory vegetarianism. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 8.36 billion Second Best Puppet 19ians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Industry, and Education. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 93.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Second Best Puppet 19ian economy, worth a remarkable 1,672 trillion cards a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Retail, Book Publishing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an amazing 200,112 cards, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 728,903 per year while the poor average 39,049, a ratio of 18.7 to 1.

Screams of citizens being "re-educated" echo throughout the rural regions of Second Best Puppet 19, it's said that a Second Best Puppet 19ian always pays his debts with significant compounding, major internet servers have acquired citizenship, and fashion models are guaranteed to be 100% genuinely as anorexic as they appear on magazine covers. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Second Best Puppet 19's national animal is the legendary, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Second Best Puppet 19 is ranked 318,847^th in the world and 662^nd in Two for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 36.31 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.