The Ditadura of Protzka is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Sergio Seixas with an iron fist, and renowned for its closed borders, enslaved workforce, and triple-decker prams. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 3.426 billion capitalistas are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Condado de Kanto Naboo. The average income tax rate is 90.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Protzkan economy, worth 587 trillion Dolar Real Microship Bitcoins a year, is quite specialized and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Trout Farming, and Basket Weaving. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 171,415 Dolar Real Microship Bitcoins, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.6 times as much as the poorest.

Sleep-deprived officials are known to collapse after late night revision for their examinations, the Protzkan Tourism Bureau has described the abolition of coastal defences as a "kick to the groyne", safety warnings are prohibited lest they give people ideas, and all the playground's a stage for Protzkan schoolchildren. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Protzka's national animal is the Lêmure Sifaka, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Grã Ordem do Seixismo Azul.

Protzka is ranked 7,276^th in the world and 114^th in the West Pacific for Lowest Crime Rates, with 107.6 law-abiding acts per hour.