The People's Republic of Nordgardia is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Ewiger Präsident Timsen with an even hand, and remarkable for its smutty television, irreverence towards religion, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate population of 19.896 billion Nordgardics enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Timville-Ruhrstadt. The average income tax rate is 97.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Nordgardian economy, worth a remarkable 3,654 trillion Münzes a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 183,667 Münzes, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Any secret that gets off someone's chest is promptly replaced, protesters are up in arms over new nuclear power stations, repurposed warships fire swag at company promotional events, and political spontaneity takes a lot of planning. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Nordgardia's national animal is the Deathclaw, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Nordgardia is ranked 5,677^th in the world and 134^th in The Communist Bloc for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 58.65 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.