Population | 27.338 billion |
Capital | Dineenistoria |
Leader | God-King |
Faith | Dineenianism |
Currency | organ |
Animal | tree monster |
The Holy Empire of New New Dineenistan is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by God-King with an iron fist, and renowned for its closed borders, sprawling nuclear power plants, and triple-decker prams. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 27.338 billion New New Dineenistanians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."
The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Law & Order, Industry, and Spirituality also on the agenda, while Welfare and Social Policy are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Dineenistoria. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 5.6%.
The frighteningly efficient New New Dineenistanian economy, worth a remarkable 8,636 trillion organs a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 315,904 organs, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,393,451 per year while the poor average 44,879, a ratio of 31.0 to 1.
Hundreds of sailors ride the good ship God-King day after day, jaywalking is punishable by public flogging, the Counter-Terrorism Unit has been nicknamed "Big Bad Wolf" for its tendency towards urban demolition, and it is broadly agreed that tramp stamps are criminally undesirable. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force. New New Dineenistan's national animal is the tree monster, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Dineenianism.
New New Dineenistan is ranked 1,799th in the world and 78th in Balder for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring 8,706.28 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.
National Happenings
Most Recent Government Activity:
- : Following new legislation in
New New Dineenistan, it is broadly agreed that tramp stamps are criminally undesirable.
- : Following new legislation in
New New Dineenistan, the Counter-Terrorism Unit has been nicknamed "Big Bad Wolf" for its tendency towards urban demolition.
- : Following new legislation in
New New Dineenistan, jaywalking is punishable by public flogging.
- : Following new legislation in
New New Dineenistan, hundreds of sailors ride the good ship God-King day after day.
- : Following new legislation in
New New Dineenistan, the nation's navy has been named the scourge of the seven thousand seas.
- : Following new legislation in
New New Dineenistan, immigrant herding has become a national pastime.
- : Following new legislation in
New New Dineenistan, strange lights seen in the sky are officially regarded as weather balloons or hoaxes and nothing else.
- : Following new legislation in
New New Dineenistan, the only Maxxmas gift frontline troops receive from officers is a bullet with the enemy's name on it.
- : Following new legislation in
New New Dineenistan, epidemiologists happily announce that the reported incidence of depression is close to zero percent.
- : Following new legislation in
New New Dineenistan, tourist operators promise visitors tours of live burning shipwrecks and plane crash sites.