The Federation of New Mistland is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Mr Mist with an even hand, and renowned for its smutty television, unlimited-speed roads, and public floggings. The compassionate, democratic population of 1.657 billion New Mistlandians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mistopolis. The average income tax rate is 71.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient New Mistlandian economy, worth 188 trillion bitcoins a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Automobile Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 113,559 bitcoins, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Politicians demand do-overs when they don't agree with election outcomes, politicians are often found scavenging bins at night to supplement their income, the most common answers to where babies come from are "uh... ask your mother" and "um... ask your father", and multiple births are a cause of celebration for tax collectors. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. New Mistland's national animal is the Penguins, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Mistianism.

New Mistland is ranked 21,737^th in the world and 631^st in the South Pacific for Most Advanced Public Education, scoring 6,835.99 on the Edu-tellignce® Test Score.