The Free Land of New Byeef Egg is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Light And Crispy Waffle Boy with a fair hand, and remarkable for its national health service, state-planned economy, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, democratic population of 16.077 billion New Byeef Eggboyes are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The enormous, liberal, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Boilt Aeggington. The average income tax rate is 90.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The New Byeef Eggian economy, worth a remarkable 1,247 trillion Cheesewheels a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is mostly made up of the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Basket Weaving, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is 77,575 Cheesewheels, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Party-lovers often change religions just for the weekend, thieves find battery shops juicier targets than banks, a child's only Trickster Night scare is the sight of their parents dancing, and foreign nations kill migratory animals at random in the hope that New Byeef Egg will pay them to stop. Crime is totally unknown. New Byeef Egg's national animal is the Cat but armed with an axe, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

New Byeef Egg is ranked 3,752^nd in the world and 197^th in Osiris for Most Pacifist, with 161.29 cheeks turned per day.