The Oppressed Peoples of Lower Slobbovia is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by Comrade Nogoodnik with an iron fist, and renowned for its avowedly heterosexual populace, infamous sell-swords, and ubiquitous missile silos. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 8.638 billion Lower Slobbovians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Slivovitz. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Lower Slobbovian economy, worth a remarkable 2,597 trillion Plastic Rasbuckniks a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an amazing 300,749 Plastic Rasbuckniks, with the richest citizens earning 5.8 times as much as the poorest.

Warfare increasingly resembles a video game, rocket boots and thermal detonators have become standard-issue military gear, school cafeterias serve nothing but protein powder and vitamin supplements, and debates on whether toilet seats should be left up or down are increasingly commonplace. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Lower Slobbovia's national animal is the Russian Bear, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Equity Amongst the Masses.

Lower Slobbovia is ranked 285^th in the world and 1^st in The Embassy for Most Patriotic, with 158.68 flags saluted per person per day.