The Republic of Kelsyth is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Lena with a fair hand, and renowned for its otherworldly petting zoo, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 9.893 billion Kelsythians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Alnelenora. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Kelsythian economy, worth a remarkable 2,646 trillion Korunas a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 267,496 Korunas, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Cassocked priests and choirboys believe that what happens behind closed doors stays behind closed doors, diplomatic missions typically end with a flurry of childish insults, accusations and phlegm, grinding bureaucracy has the international wheels of justice turning slowly, and sexually-starved male dinosaurs terrorise tourists during weekly breakouts from Mesozoic Park. Crime is totally unknown. Kelsyth's national animal is the Hippogryph, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Faewryni.

Kelsyth is ranked 1,278^th in the world and 22^nd in The East Pacific for Most Rebellious Youth, scoring 75 on the Stark-Dean Displacement Index.