The Holy Empire of Itsik is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Yaya with an iron fist, and remarkable for its state-planned economy, ban on automobiles, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 6.796 billion Itsikais are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Spirituality. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Yayaville. The average income tax rate is 84.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The Itsikian economy, worth 516 trillion sous a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, highly specialized black market in Uranium Mining, Arms Manufacturing, and Trout Farming. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 75,938 sous, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

All fantasy fiction has officially been deemed non-canon, school guidance counselors recommend monastic vows as an alternative to higher education, people often get liposuction to reduce their air fares, and summer science camps are regularly raided by narcotics police. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Itsik's national animal is the wolf and its national religion is Yayatisme.

Itsik is ranked 28,442^nd in the world and 34^th in Spiritus for Lowest Crime Rates, with 83.66 law-abiding acts per hour.