The United Empire of Hyponichtmallieturam is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Emperor Noel the III with an iron fist, and renowned for its compulsory military service, national health service, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, cynical, humorless population of 13.346 billion Hyponians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Wellington. The average income tax rate is 96.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Hyponichtian economy, worth a remarkable 2,277 trillion Hypon Turams a year, is quite specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 170,685 Hypon Turams, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Older ladies are inundated with offers to help them cross the road, adult magazines are having a sales resurgence as internet anonymity disappears, the alien invasion siren sounds eerily like a UFO, and the number of eyes rolled per maths lesson is increasing exponentially. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Hyponichtmallieturam's national animal is the Cow, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Tulipism.

Hyponichtmallieturam is ranked 174,385^th in the world and 2,753^rd in the Rejected Realms for Most Conservative, scoring 53.08 on the Bush-Santorum Dawning Terror Index.