The Divine Empire of Hellvorta is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Heavenly Emperor Typhon with an iron fist, and notable for its museums and concert halls, irreverence towards religion, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 2.829 billion Demons are rabid consumers, partly through choice and partly because the government tells them to and dissenters tend to vanish from their homes at night.

The tiny, corrupt, pro-business government prioritizes Industry, although Education, Administration, and Defense are also considered important, while Spirituality and Environment receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Heliopolis. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 5.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Hellvortan economy, worth 567 trillion Chrisos a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Retail, Arms Manufacturing, and Gambling. Average income is an amazing 200,489 Chrisos, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,778,882 per year while the poor average 3,125, a ratio of 569 to 1.

Street cleaners are noticeably glum during jubilee celebrations, the tinfoil-hat crowd also recommend tinfoil wallets, the mood of raunchy movies is often ruined by the sound of babies crying, and prospective secessionists nervously declare how worthless and unimportant they are. Crime, especially youth-related, is pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Hellvorta's national animal is the Tyrannosaurus Imperator, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Divine Year.

Hellvorta is ranked 305,172^nd in the world and 5,686^th in The North Pacific for Most Patriotic, with 0.62 flags saluted per person per day.