The Eternal Misfortune of Heliosphere is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Leader with an iron fist, and remarkable for its smutty television, unlimited-speed roads, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, cynical, humorless population of 17.635 billion Heliospherans are prohibited from doing almost everything except voting, which they do timidly and conservatively.

The large, corrupt, socially-minded government prioritizes Education, with Environment, Industry, and Administration also on the agenda, while Defense and Spirituality are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Heliosphere City. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Heliospheran economy, worth an astonishing 12,946 trillion Novas a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, quite specialized black market in Information Technology and Cheese Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 734,160 Novas, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Extreme political groups are outlawed, small shoes often wash up on the beach, phone taps are frequently carried out by the police, and criminals always seem to be forewarned of police raids. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Heliosphere's national animal is the Meteor, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Atheism.

Heliosphere is ranked 157^th in the world and 5^th in Pencil Sharpeners Puppet Storage for Lowest Crime Rates, with 264.56 law-abiding acts per hour.