The Colony of Gargnys is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Governor Elkan Theend with an iron fist, and renowned for its anti-smoking policies, ritual sacrifices, and fear of technology. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 18.196 billion Gargnysians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Industry, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ingarie. The average income tax rate is 72.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Gargnysian economy, worth a remarkable 2,128 trillion Delechies a year, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Soda Sales, Uranium Mining, and Woodchip Exports. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 116,997 Delechies, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.1 times as much as the poorest.

Vanity is considered the fifth cardinal virtue, the government is attempting to impose a new national language on the public, all the playground's a stage for Gargnysian schoolchildren, and there's more pink stuff on sale these days. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Gargnys's national animal is the toad, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Islam.

Gargnys is ranked 39,752^nd in the world and 9^th in The Glorious Evolution for Lowest Crime Rates, with 77.79 law-abiding acts per hour.