The Highly Efficient Empire of Evilonians is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Supreme Sumi with an iron fist, and notable for its free-roaming dinosaurs, irreverence towards religion, and restrictive gun laws. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 2.838 billion Eviloners are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Area 27. The average income tax rate is 44.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Evil economy, worth 482 trillion Einars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 169,945 Einars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.6 times as much as the poorest.

Immigrant herding has become a national pastime, the nationalized auto industry is adept at making durable little cars nobody wants to drive, bad punctuation has come to a full stop, and teachers regularly paddle unruly students. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Evilonians's national animal is the Flying Squirrel, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Mehism.

Evilonians is ranked 29,765^th in the world and 1,891^st in Osiris for Lowest Crime Rates, with 82.87 law-abiding acts per hour.