Knowledge is Power
Highest Drug Use: 1,642ndLargest Soda Pop Sector: 2,012thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 2,532nd
The Panda's Federal Republic of
Communications Officer
Civil Rights
Political Freedom
Widely Abused

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Europeia Dispatch Office

Population15.974 billion

CapitalRaging Coolidgetopia
Leadera Panda that wandered into the Capitol


The Panda's Federal Republic of Europeia Dispatch Office is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by a Panda that wandered into the Capitol with a fair hand, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, smutty television, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 15.974 billion Dispatchers live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The relatively small, liberal, pro-business, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Raging Coolidgetopia. The average income tax rate is 33.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Europeian economy, worth a remarkable 2,768 trillion Dispatches a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Soda Sales. Average income is an impressive 173,327 Dispatches, with the richest citizens earning 5.4 times as much as the poorest.

Barbed wire entanglements and guard towers surround the Raging Coolidgetopia Natural History Museum, fruit market traders let their stock spoil rather than reduce their prices at the day's end, legislators work 24/7 due to an influx of single-issue bills, and the nation's prisons are touted as the best weight loss programs money can't buy. Crime is well under control. Europeia Dispatch Office's national animal is the Journalist, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Europeia Dispatch Office is ranked 24,952nd in the world and 233rd in Europeia for Most Popular Tourist Destinations, with 1,143.78 tourists per hour.

Highest Drug Use: 1,642ndLargest Soda Pop Sector: 2,012thTop
Largest Cheese Export Sector: 2,532ndLargest Publishing Industry: 2,636thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 4,180thHighest Disposable Incomes: 4,424thMost Stationary: 4,612thMost Rebellious Youth: 4,679thMost Efficient Economies: 4,721stHighest Economic Output: 5,833rdMost Cultured: 6,423rdMost Cheerful Citizens: 7,167thMost Subsidized Industry: 7,476thSmartest Citizens: 8,570thNudest: 9,168thMost Influential: 9,589thLargest Gambling Industry: 9,820thHighest Average Incomes: 9,956thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 11,663rdLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 11,803rdFattest Citizens: 11,874thTop
Highest Food Quality: 12,322ndMost Developed: 14,692ndMost Scientifically Advanced: 15,070thMost Extensive Civil Rights: 15,781stLargest Populations: 16,226thMost Politically Free: 16,299thMost Advanced Public Education: 16,538thLargest Information Technology Sector: 17,790thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 19,214thMost Inclusive: 22,067thHighest Poor Incomes: 22,669thLargest Insurance Industry: 22,858th
Most Politically Free: 4th in the regionHighest Drug Use: 5th in the regionTop
Most Extensive Civil Rights: 9th in the regionMost Stationary: 12th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 13th in the regionMost Extreme: 21st in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 21st in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 22nd in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 27th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 30th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 32nd in the regionNudest: 32nd in the regionFattest Citizens: 35th in the regionTop
Highest Wealthy Incomes: 49th in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 49th in the regionMost Pro-Market: 50th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 53rd in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 54th in the regionLargest Populations: 58th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 66th in the regionMost Armed: 69th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 69th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 72nd in the regionMost Cultured: 75th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 85th in the regionRudest Citizens: 86th in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 86th in the region

National Happenings

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