Knowledge is Power
Highest Drug Use: 1,624thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1,892ndLargest Publishing Industry: 2,424th
The Panda's Federal Republic of
Communications Officer
Civil Rights
Political Freedom
Widely Abused

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Europeia Dispatch Office

Population13.147 billion

CapitalRaging Coolidgetopia
Leadera Panda that wandered into the Capitol


The Panda's Federal Republic of Europeia Dispatch Office is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by a Panda that wandered into the Capitol with a fair hand, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, flagrant waste-dumping, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 13.147 billion Dispatchers live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The relatively small, liberal, pro-business, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Raging Coolidgetopia. The average income tax rate is 33.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Europeian economy, worth a remarkable 2,278 trillion Dispatches a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Soda Sales. Average income is an impressive 173,324 Dispatches, with the richest citizens earning 5.4 times as much as the poorest.

Barbed wire entanglements and guard towers surround the Raging Coolidgetopia Natural History Museum, fruit market traders let their stock spoil rather than reduce their prices at the day's end, legislators work 24/7 due to an influx of single-issue bills, and the nation's prisons are touted as the best weight loss programs money can't buy. Crime is well under control. Europeia Dispatch Office's national animal is the Journalist, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Europeia Dispatch Office is ranked 11,164th in the world and 96th in Europeia for Largest Basket Weaving Sector, scoring 6,307.5 on the Hickory Productivity Index.

Highest Drug Use: 1,624thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1,892ndTop
Largest Publishing Industry: 2,424thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 2,668thMost Efficient Economies: 4,008thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 4,288thMost Rebellious Youth: 4,791stHighest Disposable Incomes: 4,820thMost Stationary: 5,084thMost Cultured: 6,181stHighest Economic Output: 6,203rdMost Subsidized Industry: 6,434thMost Cheerful Citizens: 6,661stSmartest Citizens: 8,026thNudest: 8,642ndLargest Gambling Industry: 9,090thHighest Average Incomes: 9,266thTop
Most Influential: 10,659thMost Extensive Civil Rights: 11,107thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 11,164thFattest Citizens: 11,230thMost Politically Free: 11,731stHighest Wealthy Incomes: 12,198thMost Developed: 13,611thMost Scientifically Advanced: 14,904thMost Advanced Public Education: 15,911thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 16,695thLargest Information Technology Sector: 16,915thLargest Populations: 17,326thMost Extreme: 18,833rdHighest Poor Incomes: 19,554thLargest Insurance Industry: 20,270th
Highest Drug Use: 3rd in the regionMost Politically Free: 5th in the regionMost Extensive Civil Rights: 5th in the regionTop
Largest Soda Pop Sector: 12th in the regionMost Stationary: 14th in the regionMost Extreme: 25th in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 27th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 28th in the regionNudest: 30th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 33rd in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 36th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 36th in the regionFattest Citizens: 41st in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 48th in the regionMost Pro-Market: 51st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 55th in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 57th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 58th in the regionTop
Largest Populations: 66th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 73rd in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 85th in the regionMost Cultured: 89th in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 92nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 93rd in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 96th in the regionRudest Citizens: 97th in the regionMost Armed: 99th in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 105th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 111th in the region

National Happenings

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