Population | 20.003 billion |
Capital | יְרוּשָׁלַיִם |
Leader | Benjamin Satanyahu |
Faith | Satanism |
Currency | שקל |
Animal | gazelle |
The Walled Cities of EretzIsrael is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Benjamin Satanyahu with an even hand, and renowned for its public floggings, free-roaming dinosaurs, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless population of 20.003 billion EretzIsraelians are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.
The minute, corrupt, pro-business government, or what there is of one, prioritizes Industry, with Defense also on the agenda, while Environment and Welfare aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of יְרוּשָׁלַיִם. Income tax is unheard of.
The frighteningly efficient EretzIsraelian economy, worth an astonishing 15,237 trillion שקלs a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Gambling, and Uranium Mining. Average income is a breathtaking 761,741 שקלs, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 7,105,673 per year while the poor average 7,223, a ratio of 983 to 1.
The comic book series 'Benjamin Satanyahu and the Villainous Corporate Cronies' is a best-seller, children who believe in the tooth fairy are frequently shipped off to Bigtopia, the government nonchalantly sells old nukes to other countries, and economic output is rising as the chronically depressed are persuaded not to burden society. Crime is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. EretzIsrael's national animal is the gazelle, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Satanism.
EretzIsrael is ranked 241,568th in the world and 10,178th in The North Pacific for Most Advanced Public Education, scoring -63.48 on the Edu-tellignce® Test Score.
National Happenings
Most Recent Government Activity:
- : Following new legislation in
EretzIsrael, economic output is rising as the chronically depressed are persuaded not to burden society.
- : Following new legislation in
EretzIsrael, the government nonchalantly sells old nukes to other countries.
- : Following new legislation in
EretzIsrael, children who believe in the tooth fairy are frequently shipped off to Bigtopia.
- : Following new legislation in
EretzIsrael, the comic book series 'Benjamin Satanyahu and the Villainous Corporate Cronies' is a best-seller.
- : Following new legislation in
EretzIsrael, agricultural employees work for peanuts.
- : Following new legislation in
EretzIsrael, the nation is known abroad for fast food and nothing else.
- : Following new legislation in
EretzIsrael, the diplomatic corps stinks.
- : Following new legislation in
EretzIsrael, people are often woken up by rubbish music.
- : Following new legislation in
EretzIsrael, the government is accused of being heartless by those considered brainless.
- : Following new legislation in
EretzIsrael, the morbidly obese often sell stock options on their own corpses.