NATION

PASSWORD

בתחבולות תעשה לך מלחמה‎
Fattest Citizens: 3rdRudest Citizens: 3rdLargest Retail Industry: 4th
The Walled Cities of
Capitalist Paradise
Influence
Minnow
Civil Rights
Excellent
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Excellent

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

EretzIsrael

Population23.133 billion

Capitalיְרוּשָׁלַיִם
LeaderBenjamin Satanyahu
FaithSatanism

Currencyשקל
Animalgazelle

The Walled Cities of EretzIsrael is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Benjamin Satanyahu with a fair hand, and notable for its deadly medical pandemics, rampant corporate plagiarism, and keen interest in outer space. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless population of 23.133 billion EretzIsraelians are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The minute, corrupt, pro-business government, or what there is of one, prioritizes Industry, with Defense also on the agenda, while Environment and Welfare receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of יְרוּשָׁלַיִם. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient EretzIsraelian economy, worth an astonishing 19,072 trillion שקלs a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Gambling, Information Technology, and Soda Sales. Average income is a breathtaking 824,475 שקלs, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 7,690,938 per year while the poor average 7,817, a ratio of 983 to 1.

Foragers descend on national cemeteries for 'all-you-can-dig-up' extravaganzas, chickens roam the streets freely, insurance companies charge extortionate premiums to cover homes near waterways, and town welcome signs list corporate sponsors. Crime is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. EretzIsrael's national animal is the gazelle, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Satanism.

EretzIsrael is ranked 7th in the world and 1st in The North Pacific for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 83,546.97 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.

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Fattest Citizens: 3rdRudest Citizens: 3rdLargest Retail Industry: 4thMost Avoided: 5thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 5thLargest Gambling Industry: 7thMost Corrupt Governments: 8thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 9thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 12thHighest Disposable Incomes: 15thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 17thMost Secular: 18thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 19thMost Efficient Economies: 23rdLargest Insurance Industry: 30thMost Armed: 31stHighest Crime Rates: 34thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 37thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 38thHighest Average Incomes: 38thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 44thMost Scientifically Advanced: 47thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 54thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 63rdLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 69thLargest Mining Sector: 81stHighest Economic Output: 115thLargest Agricultural Sector: 148thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 224thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 620thLargest Information Technology Sector: 862ndMost Pro-Market: 1,358thMost Subsidized Industry: 2,216thTop
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Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2,876thLargest Governments: 2,947thMost Stationary: 3,171stLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 6,583rdLargest Populations: 6,873rdMost Valuable International Artwork: 7,219thLargest Black Market: 8,726thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 8,901stMost Advanced Defense Forces: 9,101stLargest Publishing Industry: 9,392ndSmartest Citizens: 10,537thMost Influential: 12,698thTop
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Most World Assembly Endorsements: 18,116th
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Most Avoided: 1st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionFattest Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 1st in the regionRudest Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 1st in the regionMost Secular: 1st in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Armed: 1st in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 1st in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 1st in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 1st in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 1st in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1st in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 2nd in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 2nd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 2nd in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 2nd in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 3rd in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 4th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 4th in the regionMost Pro-Market: 5th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 8th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 23rd in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 49th in the regionMost Stationary: 72nd in the regionLargest Populations: 81st in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 102nd in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 103rd in the regionTop
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Largest Governments: 146th in the regionLargest Black Market: 200th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 293rd in the regionHighest Drug Use: 308th in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 356th in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 376th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 447th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 498th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 559th in the regionTop
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Nudest: 1,070th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, town welcome signs list corporate sponsors.
  • : EretzIsrael was reclassified from "Corporate Bordello" to "Capitalist Paradise".
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, insurance companies charge extortionate premiums to cover homes near waterways.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, chickens roam the streets freely.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, foragers descend on national cemeteries for 'all-you-can-dig-up' extravaganzas.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, bar brawls are an hourly occurrence.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, prominent cultural symbols are featured on the backs of cereal boxes.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, anti-government political posters adorn every building like wallpaper.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, having skeletons in one's closet is no longer just a macabre idiom.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, the nation's most "productive" diamond mine hasn't been operational for seven months.

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