The Federal Republic of Elwin is a colossal, orderly nation, notable for its national health service, compulsory military service, and public floggings. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 5.794 billion Elwinians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The relatively small, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Education, Healthcare, and Law & Order are also considered important, while Spirituality and International Aid aren't funded at all. The average income tax rate is 18.8%.

The strong Elwinian economy, worth 349 trillion Pounds a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Furniture Restoration, Book Publishing, and Automobile Manufacturing. Average income is 60,399 Pounds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.2 times as much as the poorest.

Nudity is frowned upon, minority children spend hours bussing to schools miles away from home, small businesses are gobbled up almost daily by corporate giants, and people eagerly queue days at A&E to wait for their free healthcare. Crime, especially youth-related, is relatively low, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Elwin's national animal is the Swan, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Elwin is ranked 196,847^th in the world and 8,538^th in Balder for Lowest Crime Rates, with 56.97 law-abiding acts per hour.