The Dictatorship of Depressed Nation is a massive, efficient nation, renowned for its otherworldly petting zoo, compulsory military service, and compulsory gun ownership. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 2.911 billion Depressed Nationians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Depressed Kids. The average income tax rate is 73.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Depressed Nationian economy, worth 474 trillion Bits a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, fairly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Tourism, and Cheese Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 162,923 Bits, with the richest citizens earning 5.2 times as much as the poorest.

Rumours have it that a secret police is responsible for the recent spate of missing persons, ambitious "businessmen" use their children to sell and advertise their products, officials pull all-nighters to check immigrants for potential links to terrorists, and construction of the Really Big Hadron Collider is underway. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Depressed Nation's national animal is the Money, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Depressed Nation is ranked 183,670^th in the world and 8,714^th in the South Pacific for Most Income Equality, scoring 19.26 on the Marx-Engels Emancipation Scale.