The Kingdom of Darkmen is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by agustus nero with an iron fist, and renowned for its sprawling nuclear power plants, avowedly heterosexual populace, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 23.078 billion Darkmenians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The minute, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government, or what there is of one, prioritizes Defense, with Industry and Law & Order also on the agenda, while Environment and Welfare are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Darkmen City. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Darkmenian economy, worth an astonishing 13,019 trillion human femaleses a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Retail, Gambling, and Uranium Mining. Average income is a breathtaking 564,144 human femaleses, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 4,015,031 per year while the poor average 26,195, a ratio of 153 to 1.

Industry tycoons rarely hide their misdeeds due to the government's habit of bailing them out, education is transforming people into first-rate snobs, sharks are enjoying their deliveries of canned food, and heavily-armed commandos play rock-paper-scissors over whether to execute criminals and foreign visitors. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Darkmen's national animal is the rancors, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Darkmen is ranked 50,969^th in the world and 728^th in the South Pacific for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring 4,354.07 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.