The Armed Republic of Asplundh is a gargantuan, cultured nation, renowned for its infamous sell-swords, irreverence towards religion, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 12.964 billion Asplundhians enjoy extensive civil freedoms, particularly in social issues, while business tends to be more regulated.

The medium-sized, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Education, and Defense. The average income tax rate is 57.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Asplundhian economy, worth a remarkable 1,566 trillion titty tassels a year, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, and Retail. Black market activity is extensive. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 120,824 titty tassels, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Crop circles are intently studied by investigators with questionable merits, authorities are looking for a stool pigeon to rat out who is stealing food from pigeon toilets, elections are won by the candidate who makes the best 'yo mama' jokes, and children must make a homemade spinach and ricotta rotolo by high school or be held back. Crime, especially youth-related, is moderate, probably because of the absence of a police force. Asplundh's national animal is the snake, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Asplundh is ranked 61,801^st in the world and 667^th in 10000 Islands for Largest Welfare Programs, scoring 1,734.39 on the Safety Net Mesh Density Rating.